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Post by Honeylioness on Nov 2, 2009 13:00:50 GMT -5
Honeylioness - 11/04/09 09:17 AM Gin1984 - While I am personally a rabid eucharistic junkie (I personally don't believe I have been to church if there is is no sacrament) I try as best I can to remember that other people find different paths to the divine. And while I may not fully agree, or understand, their beliefs - and may engage in one-on-one discussion about that - please know I would not publicly "bash" anyone for holding them. I usually save my "bashing" for morons who think women are chattel, children are commodoties or those who think abusing any animal is acceptable. jillbean - that's wonderful news about the assistance money for utilities! I am going to STRONGLY urge you to get a "blanket" for your water heater as well as foam sleeves for the pipes going to and from the unit. You should be able to get these at any hardware store - just know the size of your heater and the diameter of the pipes before you go. I did my entire utility room for under $3 covering just the pipes. People really have no idea how much heat they lose, and how much money is wasted, with uninsulated piping. Angel - Good for you in seeking out a counselor for yourself. Over the years I have had three - each one I met up with during specific traumatic or difficult times in my life - and each was amazing and helped me so much. The biggest thing you will learn is what is YOU and what is other people's responsibility, and you can only control YOU - no one else. Once I "got" that I could learn to relax and not let all the little things pile up on me until I felt as though I was going to shatter into a million pieces. Please remember you can always contact me off board if you need to talk. Gin1984 - 11/04/09 10:25 AMJillbean- I don’t agree with most modern pagan that think a few years is enough studying and then they are the grand pooba. My group is old so we are a bit stricker, I have been studying for 12 years now and still have a ways to go, damn school keeps getting it the way. I am so glad you got the heat assistance, that should help you so much. Honey: I don’t mind discussion, off the board if you want. I was raised Catholic so I understand the confusion. We had a pagan study group at my Catholic high school, that brought up a ton of question, lol. But “I usually save my "bashing" for morons who think women are chattel, children are commodoties or those who think abusing any animal is acceptable.” LOL, thanks I will remember this phase, it sums up things up so well. Honeylioness - 11/04/09 11:06 AM So last night I swing by the grocery store for some needed items (like bread and eggs) and I even had a list with me which I KEPT to!! In my freezer I have two "fish boxes". These are sturdy plastic containers with lids that the grocery store my mother used to work at would receive fish fillets in. I have one for meat and one for chicken. This way I can buy large packages, divide them into small portions, wrap them and put them into their respective "box" so I have a store of meat on hand and don't have to run to the store every day. Anyway............. Anne went out to the movies last night with a friend and when she got home wanted a snack. So she opens the refrigerator and just stared. I had four large packages of chicken parts I had bought that night but not yet sorted, piled into the fridge. About 15 pounds all together. And a large package of ground beef - about 8 pounds worth that had been marked down to $0.79 a pound. She thinks it is incredibly funny that "Americans" buy such large quantities of stuff. But hey!!! The chicken was on sale for $0.99 a pound AND one of them had an attached in-store coupon. Why would I pass that up if I have the room to stash them? I think this was even more impressive to her than the 36 count package of toilet paper I brought home from Costco. But then I have to remember that her mother does not cook - at all. With the exception of special ocassions like Christmas. Honeylioness - 11/04/09 12:46 PM Firebird - I am not adult although I play one from 08:00-05:00 Muttley - could be worse, instead of a stranded turtle you could have pulled what my mom did. Two weeks before I was born she tripped and fell off a curb. Make a five-point landing in the intersection (hands, knees & belly). She had not seen her feet in almost three months I was so big. And she nearly gave a young cop who saw the accident, heart failure. Apparently he jumped out of his car and ran to her side, forgetting he was in the middle of an intersection and had not set his brake ... OOPPSS.... how would you like to explain to your insurance agent why it was not your fault your car got hit by a patrol car rolling through a busy town square on it's own? Honeylioness - 11/04/09 01:59 PM SES - I have a super secret double pinky swear list of cool sites and images. I could tell you what it is - but then I would have to upload a virus to you Airfare - I have to purchase the tickets for Anne and myself to go on our nation-wide Christmas tour. I think I got a pretty good deal through my corporate travel agent. Manchester, NH-Seattle-Phoenix-Manchester over an 11 day period for $630 per person. Now I just have to bit the bullet, blow the dust and cobwebs off my one little credit card hiding in my bedroom and buy the suckers. Firebird. - 11/04/09 02:10 PM ROFL. You're a funny one, Miss Honeylioness! Normally I don't like anyone to be funny because usually I'm not funny anymore by comparison, but your comments are awesome. Honeylioness - 11/04/09 10:54 PM nitza - I will flying into SeaTac on December 20th and leaving for Phoenix December 27th. I would LOVE to get together for a real cup of coffee (i.e. NOT Starbucks). Is there still a Half-Price Books open in the U District? There used to be one in Edmonds but they closed it a few years ago. EoG - I owe you an e-mail planning what day works for you this weekend to get together in Boston. Parent Update - My dad called this evening. He has taken this consulting job and is going to be in Boston next week on business. He is is going to come to my place for dinner at least two of the nights he is around. That's and unexpected surprise. nitza19 - 11/05/09 02:08 AM Honey - I'll be here! actually, if you could, please email me at arts_dk at yahoo dot com with that info because I will be sure to lose AND forget it between then and now. Yep there's a HPB in the u-district. One up in capitol hill (my neighborhood) too. I could also tell you yummy/cheap restaurants by each  And good (real) coffee places! Elusions of Grandeur - 11/05/09 02:45 PM *Happy dances* I get to meet the awesome Honeylioness! financially_aware2012 - 11/05/09 08:58 PM Is anybody else like me and tend to finish Christmas shopping by December 1st?  I love finding the perfect gift for somebody, something they don't know they want, didn't ask for, and when they open it, think 'wow. this is perfect for me!' Sharing the Simple Lifestyle - 11/06/09 12:07 AMUm. Definitely smartstart. Very likely calsfan and R2B2. Probably SES_ and most of the others. Is there a category for "Still wrapping at 2:30 am Dec. 25th?" Wow! No wonder your VDBF adores you! Honeylioness - 11/06/09 08:27 AM Hmmmmm - Awesome? Thanks, way to put pressure on a girl. Think I can grow four inches taller and lose 40 pounds by tomorrow??? This comment gave me an odd mental image. Horatio bent over a ledger sheet laying in the middle of the street in the opening scene of CPA:Miami ....... Horatio: " Alix .... " Alix: " I won't know until I get it back to the morgue but see where this edge is torn and ragged? Poor baby was ripped from it's ledger" Frank: " Well, it is March, you know how things tend to heat up around here going into April" Horatio: " Hmmm, Frank, see this smudge where the vertical on the 9 has been altered. I think someone has altered this digit to try and hide it's original form, or it crossed the ledger line. We could have a turn war on our hands." LOL - Well five years ago you would have been correct and my comment would have been a LOT less positive. red-wagon - I am with you!!! If I was living in New York today I would have to call in "Sox" .. as in " Sorry Mr. Boss Man, I have a deadly allergy to pinstripes" Any way you could combine the two? You know, adjust the change to "OhhhmmmdiverthingyerfromeavesintoinfiltrationbasinOhmmmmmm" financially_aware - My annual goal is to be done with my Christmas shopping, AND wrapping, AND shipping of said gifts by the Saturday of Thanksgiving weekend. Doing pretty well so far, just need something for my father and pick up a book about my town and it's history for Anne's parents. reenee - This was my first thought as well though Sharing beat me to the punch. Are you able to get more done in a day they either of them? Perhaps someone at the head office has noticed and they need to bring you down to their level of lazy because they don't want to exert any effort. I found it really suspicious that they sat you down together. I would see that as a blitz attack. startsmart - My NaNo count is about 3,700 words at the moment. I am fleshing out the short story I started last year for another challenge. But I feel your angst - I have not added anything in two days. calsfan - 11/06/09 09:28 AM Sharing---I am definitely one that will finish shopping by December 1st. I have to ship to California, so I have to get a leg up and do it early. Sometimes I swear the Pony Express still delivers stuff cross country, because it takes so long for anything to get from DC to CA. Snail Actually , I am almost finished now. It helps that we cut down and aren’t buying for the siblings, just Mom and Dad and the niece and nephews. I just love shopping for the kids. It’s hard for me to stop. There’s just so many cute little things! Not like when I was kid and we played with dolls or a truck. Honey---if you can grow 4 inches taller and lose 40 pounds by tomorrow, THAT’s the recipe I WANT TO MAKE THIS WEEKEND! Please DO share!
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Post by Honeylioness on Nov 6, 2009 10:17:46 GMT -5
Nuttinhoney7 - 11/06/09 08:58 AMThings have gone from bad to worse with the DH situation. (this does NOT stand for dear). Seriously thinking about divorce, though the thought makes my stomach turn. It makes me feel like I failed. For those of you who have been through it, what was the it that made you finally do it? What pushed you over the edge? Mine keeps getting drunk and yelling and breaking stuff. It sounds stupid when I write it down but mentally i don't know if I can take it anymore. cdarrow26 - 11/06/09 09:08 AM Nuttinhoney Awww. I am so sorry you are going through this.. I've never been married, but had a similar situation with my ex-fiance. It led to the end of the relationship. That kind of behavior is a deal breaker for me. You can email me at my screen name at yahoo if you'd like to chat... MuttleynFelix - 11/06/09 09:18 AM Nuttinhoney - That does not sound stupid to me at all. It sounds like it is an issue and it can lead to bigger issues. Honeylioness - 11/06/09 09:25 AM Nuttinhoney - While I (fortunately) never made it down the aisle with my ex-Fiance I feel compelled to share a few things with you as someone who grew up with similar behavior when I was young. First of all, regardless of what the other person says, especially when they are drunk, it is NOT your fault. Most of the time the verbal lashing out they do is aimed at themselves, their failings, and their feelings of inadequacy. You just happen to be the convenient, and safer, target than say their boss, or best friend. Whether or not your husband drinks every day or just binges a few times a week, my opinion is he definitely has a problem with alcohol. I would like to encourage you to find an Al-Anon meeting in your area and start attending. These are run as an off shoot of A.A. and provide wonderful support and a safe place to cry and vent for spouses, partners and children of alcoholics. Please consider attending a few meetings. Not because of anything he does or doesn't do - but for yourself. To see you are not alone in dealing with this kind of situation. Secondly, people get angry. And even say things they regret later - once in a while. But when it begins to happen regularly and starts escalating, which I am thinking your situation is, it does not abate on it's own. I know confrontation is a hard thing for most people to handle, and I am not recommending you do this while your spouse is drunk, but the reality is that until you set your own personal line in the sand and are able to stare him in the eye and not back down - he has no reason or motivation to change. If however that has already been done, and he chooses to ignore the boundaries, then the hardest thing to come to understand is that his own addiction, juvenille behavior and personal issues are much more important to him than his relationship with you. And that, I am afraid, is something you cannot change. Only he can make the decision and the effort to alter this destructive, and self destructive, behavior. But until he does ... YOU DO NOT HAVE TO TOLERATE IT.I understand the queasy feeling in the pit of your stomach at the idea of divorce, the sweaty palms thinking of all the paperwork, time, cost, ramifications of money and legalities. But your first responsibility is to take care of yourself. In my belief system, and in an ideal world, the husband would take as deadly serious his spiritual and moral obligations towards his wife as outlined in Ephesians, Proverbs, Colossians and I Corinthians. But alas, not only to too few men know these rules, too few actually obey them. www.eadshome.com/husbands.htmRegardless of whether you and he can agree to counseling - both together and individually. Whether you kick him out or leave - please remember this most vital thing: YOU DID NOT FAIL.The marriage may fail, but if you have made the effort. If you have tried to work on things together and as individuals, then you have TRIED. Hang in there. Feel free to contact me off board at honeylioness at juno dot com if you need to talk some more. My father was a raging alcoholic all during my growing up. Al-Anon helped me and my mother tremendously so I could stop blaming myself for not being perfect enough to stop daddy from drinking. calsfan - 11/06/09 09:28 AMNuttinhoney[/b]---I’m sorry about the situation with DH. Hugs to you. Please, if you don’t feel safe, please get out! kath74 - 11/06/09 09:39 AM nuttinhoney[/b] - oh boy. Great Big Hugs for you I've been through that. Alcoholism, depression, destruction..... and it took me a very long time to come to the point where I felt I could leave. It's not stupid to write it down , a single phrase like "drunk and yelling and breaking stuff" is now very scary for me, and I'm sure for others. My straws were my mom telling me privately "you don't have to live like this!" and then realizing, no matter how I tried to help, things weren't and hadn't gotten better, and were in fact getting worse. It did feel a bit like failing at first, but then I also realized that I had tried so hard to help, I knew I had done everything I could, and that can't be a failure. Please, just be safe. Gin1984 - 11/06/09 10:00 AM Nuttinhoney: Getting drunk and yelling and breaking things would get me to a breaking point too. You did not fail, seeing that a situation is not good for you and removing yourself is not failing, it is protecting yourself. phitigirl - 11/06/09 10:41 AM nuttinhoney - This sounds like something I could have stated a few years ago. It went from yelling and breaking stuff to hitting walls to hitting me. That's when I finally decided I had had enough. Please don't let it get to this point. Divorce is hard. I won't lie to you. But it is worth it when you're in a situation like this. You are strong and will make life a success but you can't do anything when you're being held down like you are now. Please take care of yourself. Sharing the Simple Lifestyle - 11/06/09 01:30 PM nuttinhoney, I had the pleasure. It was a brief, ill-considered re-marriage, mercifully short. What kath74 wrote, told my tale, too. One night- it was November- the dog and I were cowered at the back corner of the kitchen, behind a chair. The drunken rant lasted for five hours. By January, I had my separation papers. In between, fear, terror and the determination to never, ever, ever marry again. Two miracles happened. I stumbled across a small book on a remainder table about abusive relationships. I stood rooted in the spot, read the book cover to cover and stumbled back out of the store. Picture a stadium light going on. The second miracle was that by the oddest of circumstances, no record of the marriage could be found in our Province's registry several years later when I required the papers. Our pastor was leaving for vacation and a new post the next morning after the wedding. With the confusion, it became clear she had never registered the marriage. Sheila in Cali - 11/06/09 02:23 PM Nuttin: For me the turning point was when my ex-husband told me I should be grateful to him for "toughening me up". Basically I should thank him for being abusive because he made me stronger? Um, yeah I don't think so. You need to ask yourself what are you getting out of the relationship? Is your Husband your partner in your everyday life? I know this is a difficult decision for you. But honestly given your previous post I think you have your answer. nuttinhoney, dear, start your planning RIGHT now to leave. Your mental and physical safety depends upon it. There is simply no other option. It's not necessarily the breakdown of your marriage. However, you should be safe somewhere while you negotiate an "out" or a strong conditions "in." Nuttinhoney7 - 11/06/09 03:06 PM Thanks everyone for the advice. I have a lot of thinking and a lot of number crunching to do. There are a lot of little things that would have to be figured out. I only slept two and a half hours the other night due to what i said before. Last night I slept from six at night until 7 this morning when i got up for work. It still feels like i need more though. Bugs2816 - 11/06/09 03:20 PM Nuttin:O'dear girlie! I know what your going through right now and it's very difficult. I've dealt with drinkers my whole life. They can be some very hard people to deal with. Both my M&D were drinkers (they stopped when I had DD. I told them that they would not see their grandchild in a bar). I've dealt with it with DBF. But listen...If you feel physically or even emotionally - (those gut feelings - please TRUST THEM) that you are in any kind of danger, please, please leave!! Even if you only leave for a couple of days, you need to do so. Believe me, I have had many breaking points in my life, and that's just what I did. I left....for a couple of weeks at ever time. I told DBF that gosh darn it, I grew up like this and I'll be damn*d if I'm going to live my adult life like that. After me leaving a couple of times, he knew that I was NOT joking!! (He is nothing like that anymore - thank heavens). I know this is going to be a very hard choice your going to have to make, but please make the wise one. I have never been married (and more than likely, never will) So I know that thinking of the D word gets your emotions going and that's very understandable. If he really loves you and respects not only you as a person but your feelings as well, he will seek help. If he needs to do it by himself, let him. If you need to go together as husband and wife, then go!! I have a feeling (just MY gut feeling) that things are not going to turn around soon enough for you. You two are young, right?? Early 20's?? Listen...you have your whole life ahead of you! You enrolled back to school, your trying to make a career for yourself (and husband) and YOU need to concentrate on that!! You do not have the time to be dealing with such behavior. Tell him, either you seek help for your problems (drinking) or I'm done. You have 2 days to make up your mind!! I know that it's going to be hard for him with you living in a collage town and all of his buddies. But he needs to realize that his "buddies" are no good!! If those are the people that he likes to hang around, he will NEVER stop drinking!! Yes, you have to change your whole circle of friends. It must be done for anything to get better. Please keep us updated. And if you need, you know what town I'm in (ask cdarrow for my email if you need it) You can stay with me. Okay?? Hugs girl Angel 33 - 11/06/09 04:33 PM Nuttin I am so sorry to hear things haven't gotten better. My ex(boyfriend not husband but we dated for 2 years) wasn't an alcoholic but he did abuse drugs. First, he started getting angry and yelling when he couldn't get his fix. Then he smashed things in my bedroom, ripped up pictures. That lasted for a few months. Then one night it turned physical. The first time it turned physical he slapped me. The next time he smacked my head into my steering wheel. The final time...He beat the tar out of me. I still have scars on my leg from it (he tried to bite my tattoo off). It took me awhile to leave him. But when I finally did it was the best decision of my life. Please know that I am not saying your husband will hit you, but many times if they are mean drunks it will eventually lead to them hitting you. You need to do what is best for you. Your safety and sanity are what is most important. You did NOT fail. Protecting yourself is NEVER failure. Please email me at angelnkel @ hotmail dot com if you ever want to talk.
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Post by Honeylioness on Nov 8, 2009 12:53:10 GMT -5
Honeylioness - 11/06/09 12:38 PM
Gee - can anyone tell I am procrastinating the packing up of our file and storage room so that they can carpet and paint it this weekend? Every time I look into that room I just wince.
One sad comment, and one positive:
I received an e-mail this morning from the district coordinator for the organization that Anne belongs to which arranges and monitors host families for exchange students. It seems on Monday morning a host mother in S.C. went to wake up her German student and found her in bed - deceased. No idea yet what happened. My heart goes out to not only the biological family, but the host family as well. What an awful thing to have happened.
However, I then spoke to the local Salvation Army office just over the state line in NH and was able to tell them that my division, between the Harvest Lunch and the rebate we got from the book sale - will be able to send them $854 which our Corporate office will match - making that $1,700 for their Food Bank. The very nice man I spoke to was so quiet for so long I thought he had hung up on me!!! When he did say thank you his voice was choked up.
THAT made my day!!!!!
Honeylioness - 11/07/09 11:03 PM[/u]
Hello Ladies,
Well, I spent a wonderful afternoon in Boston with EoG and her friend. We met in front of the Quincy Market. She is lovely young lady, besides how could I not immediately like another redhead, especially one wearing purple?
So we walked around the market and did some shopping (don't hate me but I managed to basically finish my Christmas shopping). Her friend knew of a very small restaurant in the North End, and I do mean SMALL. It sat only about fifteen people and you share a table with whoever is there. There is a large chalkboard that lists the menu, and once you order the entree is served in the sautee pan they cooked it in. I had no idea it was going to be so big though! So there I am with an order of pasta, broccoli, prawns and scallops in a garlic sauce ... and a fork. I think I was literally waddling out of the restaurant! Of course I had made a small side trip across the street to one of the most revered Italian Bakeries in Boston. So I brought home some fresh cannolli, biscottis and these wonderful raspberry filled cookies. Hmmmmmmmm.
Let's see, I took them along part of the Freedom Trail and acted as tour guide, and then we popped into the Borders bookstore where I found out she loves bookstores as much as I do! Finally I knew I had to head back home and set them up with a map and directions to my favorite museum in the Boston area - the ISGM
Overall you will be glad to know that EoG survived meeting the Lioness And yes, she has the same warped sense of humor that I do and is pretty quick with her own comebacks. Of course I did have to let her know that after she, Firebird and others conquer the world I would be pulling rand and I will be overseeing all re-structing of the Universe!
MWUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Elusions of Grandeur - 11/09/09 12:02 PM
Awww, thanks, Honey. I had a great time! Thanks for the tidbits, as many times as I've taken tours on the Freedom Trail I still didn't know everything you pointed out. I think I also waddled out of there, I couldn't believe I finished that meal (and I'm sure the nutritionist won't believe it either )! I'm glad you enjoyed us as much as we enjoyed you (does that sound wrong?) My friend/co-worker commented that I am much less violent on vacation apparently, so sorry I was a bit toned down and not my full glory EoG self.
Oh and thanks to my horrible sense of direction (I took us on one more left turn to get to the ISGM than you mentioned but we figured it out quickly) we got to the museum a bit late -- they start closing the register like a half hour before the museum, which means not only did we get in (and breezed through in a half hour) we got in for free! Yay for lacking a sense of direction, for once. Of course we also became the subjects of a random photograph for a random person who apparently is studying at some nearby University because of the direction I took us (I think he's going to title us "lost, confused tourists in Boston"); I would like to see how that turns out but I suppose I never will.
Oh and I would be glad to have you help with all the re-structuring; I plan to work on it in zones though. First Earth, then the Milky Way Galaxy, THEN expanding out to the rest of the Universe, and finally tackling all the other dimensions. You know, tackle one thing at a time so it's more manageable.
LOL! So THAT explains the circumcision... silly me I guess I only knew half the story behind that.
.
Are you sure this was a CHILD writing this!? (That made LOL at the office, so now all the managers are looking at me funny.)
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Post by Honeylioness on Nov 9, 2009 9:16:47 GMT -5
Can you imagine yourself to be the nun who is sitting at her desk grading these papers all the
while trying to keep a straight face and maintain her composure!
IT COMES FROM A CATHOLIC ELEMENTARY SCHOOL TEST. KIDS WERE ASKED QUESTIONS ABOUT THE OLD AND NEW TESTAMENTS. THE FOLLOWING STATEMENTS ABOUT THE BIBLE WERE WRITTEN BY CHILDREN. THEY HAVE NOT BEEN RETOUCHED
OR CORRECTED. INCORRECT SPELLING HAS BEEN LEFT IN.
1. IN THE FIRST BOOK OF THE BIBLE, GUINESSIS. GOD GOT TIRED OF CREATING THE WORLD SO HE TOOK THE SABBATH OFF.
2. ADAM AND EVE WERE CREATED FROM AN APPLE TREE. NOAH'S WIFE WAS JOAN OF
ARK. NOAH BUILT AND ARK AND THE ANIMALS CAME ON IN PEARS.
3. LOTS WIFE WAS A PILLAR OF SALT DURING THE DAY, BUT A BALL OF FIRE DURING THE NIGHT.
4. THE JEWS WERE A PROUD PEOPLE AND THROUGHOUT HISTORY THEY HAD TROUBLE WITH UNSYMPATHETIC GENITALS.
5. SAMPSON WAS A STRONGMAN WHO LET HIMSELF BE LED ASTRAY BY A JEZEBEL LIKE DELILAH.
6. SAMSON SLAYED THE PHILISTINES WITH THE AXE OF THE APOSTLES.
7. MOSES LED THE JEWS TO THE RED SEA WHERE THEY MADE UNLEAVENED BREAD WHICH IS BREAD WITHOUT ANY INGREDIENTS
8. THE EGYPTIANS WERE ALL DROWNED IN THE DESSERT. AFTERWARDS, MOSES WENT UP TO MOUNT CYANIDE TO GET THE TEN COMMANDMENTS.
9. THE FIRST COMMANDMENTS WAS WHEN EVE TOLD ADAM TO EAT THE APPLE.
10. THE SEVENTH COMMANDMENT IS THOU SHALT NOT ADMIT ADULTERY.
11.. MOSES DIED BEFORE HE EVER REACHED CANADA. THEN JOSHUA LED THE HEBREWS
IN THE BATTLE OF GERITOL.
12. THE GREATEST MIRICLE IN THE BIBLE IS WHEN JOSHUA TOLD HIS SON TO STAND STILL AND HE OBEYED HIM.
13. DAVID WAS A HEBREW KING WHO WAS SKILLED AT PLAYING THE LIAR. HE FOUGHT THE FINKELSTEINS, A RACE OF PEOPLE WHO LIVED IN BIBLICAL TIMES.
14. SOLOMON, ONE OF DAVIDS SONS, HAD 300 WIVES AND 700 PORCUPINES.
15. WHEN MARY HEARD SHE WAS THE MOTHER OF JESUS, SHE SANG THE MAGNA CARTA.
16. WHEN THE THREE WISE GUYS FROM THE EAST SIDE ARRIVED THEY FOUND JESUS IN THE MANAGER.
17. JESUS WAS BORN BECAUSE MARY HAD AN IMMACULATE CONTRAPTION.
18. ST. JOHN THE BLACKSMITH DUMPED WATER ON HIS HEAD.
19. JESUS ENUNCIATED THE GOLDEN RULE, WHICH SAYS TO DO UNTO OTHERS BEFORE THEY DO ONE TO YOU. HE ALSO EXPLAINED A MAN DOTH NOT LIVE BY SWEAT ALONE.
20. IT WAS A MIRICLE WHEN JESUS ROSE FROM THE DEAD AND MANAGED TO GET THE
TOMBSTONE OFF THE ENTRANCE.
21. THE PEOPLE WHO FOLLOWED THE LORD WERE CALLED THE 12 DECIBELS.
22. THE EPISTELS WERE THE WIVES OF THE APOSTLES.
23. ONE OF THE OPPOSSUMS WAS ST. MATTHEW WHO WAS ALSO A TAXIMAN.
24. ST. PAUL CAVORTED TO CHRISTIANITY, HE PREACHED HOLY ACRIMONY WHICH IS ANOTHER NAME FOR MARRAIGE.
25. CHRISTIANS HAVE ONLY ONE SPOUSE. THIS IS CALLED MONOTONY
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Post by Honeylioness on Nov 10, 2009 10:02:21 GMT -5
MP Dunleavey - 10/30/09 03:58 PM
I was just reading about "Buy Nothing Day," which occurs on Black Friday, and is meant as an alternative to the shopping mania that usually launches the holiday season.
I suppose there's nothing wrong with a day where you defiantly avoid commercial spending pressures. But will it inspire anyone scale back on holiday spending?
People always say they want to spend less, but does anyone do it? I was just thinking about how hard it is. People's expectations around gifts are really tough to change. On both sides of my family (my husband's and mine), we barely give anything--it's mostly just a Kris Kringle, plus joint gifts for the kids. Last year we didn't even do the Kris Kringle. But I always feel like something is missing. I love gifts. I just don't like the expense.
Honeylioness - 11/10/09 09:45 AM
My take on the entire Christmas shopping madness is that a lot depends on what Christmas means to you.
For my family it is a joyous religious holiday. That is not to say we do not exchange gifts - we do. And we still do stockings. However the money and the "things" are not the focus of the day. Truth be told the FOOD is usually the main attraction!
I have never stood in line with my still warm turkey sandwich just to get into a store at 4:00 am for the latest "hot" thing. However I will agree that if like chiclilme I had saved up for a large purchase such as an appliance, and knew that if I got there first thing I would get an even better deal - that I could see myself doing it that one time.
And like reeneejune (*waving at her* Hi!! Nice to see another NSCS gal venturing out onto other threads!) my annual goal is to have all my shopping done by Thanksgiving. In fact, I finished my shopping on Saturday - now just to wrap everything. My next goal is to have it all packaged and shipped on November 28th. One box to Germany, one to AZ and another to WA. This way I don't have to pawn a kidney to pay for shipping.
I also make a lot of gifts for people throughout the year and stash them in a box to have on hand as gifts. And I consider that I "shop" for Christmas year round, if I see something in May that really would fit a specific person then I get it and into the gift box it goes.
My family usually draws names and you buy for that one adult, and we set a dollar limit. Part of the fun/challenge is seeing how much you can do with that limit. There have been years when we were all so broke our limit was $10, and others when we were feeling rather flush - however the limit was still well below what many people would consider adequate - $100. I do not think anyone in my immediate family has EVER gone nuts with the plastic and then dreaded the bill come January.
In contrast is my best friend R - who routinely spends $800-$1,000 each on her MIL & FIL and brother. An average of $500 on each of her BILs & SILs, and another $1,000-$2,000 on her husband. Not to mention the two nephews. And friends. One year she showed me pictures of the "before" pile of gifts, it made my physically ill. That year it took them FIVE HOURS to unwrap everything. And this was NOT where you stopped and watched the other person - just solid unwrapping by each person.
I think this year we are more likely to see people flashing their credit cards more with disregard for the payments or their financial situation. My sense is that so many are so frustrated and unhappy with their current situation there will be a backlash of impulse spending as they try for a brief moment to pretend that things are back to "normal" for them.
I would like to believe that having a "Buy Nothing Day" would at least get some people to pause before they spend, at least long enough to make more informed financial decisions.
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Post by Honeylioness on Nov 10, 2009 13:03:23 GMT -5
Honeylioness - 11/10/09 11:28 AM(((GRRRRR..... I tried posting this last night and the stupid filter police ate the bloody thing)) MrsLynch -[/b] I have been reading the comments about faith and religion with a bit of a grin. While I usually welcome respectfully asked questions from someone who really is interested in learning - some of the comments I have gotten over the years just make me wonder how many of these people's mothers drank heavily while pregnant. Like the ex-coworker who informed me, in front of my Jewish boss, that one of the reason people did not like Jews was because they used to perform child sacrifices. Ummm...WHAT? She had remembered somewhere hearing that Abraham killed his son to worship God. Ummm ....NO!!! I had to explain to her the REAL ending and lesson of that story. *RME* And I can understand the curiosity about how your family felt about you marrying outside of the faith. For a lot of families, regardless of what that faith is, this can be a real issue. I know it would be for me - My mother's friend is still sure she could get me "married off" in about six months if I let her arrange things. While I truly appreciate the offer I think the fact that she is Hasidic, knows only men in that community, I am a member of the Anglican Church ....well, as they say "Houston, we have a problem!"Charities - over the years I have "refined" my list to just a few that I give to either monthly or regularly throughout the year: The local Humane Society, local food bank, my church and The Salvation Army. I have supported the latter for years - one of the things I like most about them is that their donation to admin cost ratio remains one of the lowest around. I recommend people check out the charity they are thinking of supporting, so that you don't find out later that only $0.20 of every dollar you gave actually went to do the work they say they do. You can find a listing of non-profits and their ratings here along with links to other watch dog sites. www.charitablechoices.org/checkout.aspI also had two stories about not so pleasant encounters with TSA - not sure who mentioned this first - but I will save them for another day. Honeylioness - 11/10/09 11:53 AMstartsmart - you go with that writing thing!! I am hoping to crank out a lot more on Saturday as Anne will be gone all day at a Chorale competition. reenee - sorry the customers have all gone to the dark side. As a customer of long standing at JoAnne's I often find myself shaking my head at what I see other people pull, or try to pull. I once stepped forward to help a rather " deer-in-the-headlights" looking associate behind the cutting table. This .... person .... had eight bolts of fabric, wanted 6" squares cut from each one, for free thank you very much, then get the sales person's design opinion as to which combo looked better together - in effect tying up a line of 15 people to get another person to design her project. I finally could not stand it anymore, I stepped out of line, walked up to the table and gently said " Ma'am perhaps I can help you figure this out and we can move aside to let the very patient crowd behind you get their fabric cut" (See, I can be nice when I want to be). 35 minutes later I had told her what to get, and the amounts (She had no belief at all in her own choices and just wanted someone else to tell her what to use), she got her fabric cut and off she went. Amusingly every customer in line behind and in front of me either caught my eye and winked or gave me a thumbs up, patted my arm or whispered a "Thank You" as they passed by. By the time I finally got my own fabric cut the manager came over and gave me three years of it for free. Hmmmmmm, in light of my Universal Domination Plan perhaps I should not have revealed this tender side of myself to my future subjects. R2B2 - I would talk privately to the son one-on-one. Explain to him that you know he gets excited to tell you and his dad things, but he has to remember that is no excuse for bad manners. Ask him how HE would like it if you just barged into his room without knocking and he was standing there naked? At his age he would probably die of shame. Considering he has lived so long in an all male household it needs to be pointed out that girls are different and that we need more privacy than boys. Perhaps if you can get him to see it from his end he will remember to knock in the future. As to answering the door - perhaps a cute sign on the inside with a line on it at about 5'5" high saying " You must be THIS tall to answer the door"Elusions of Grandeur - 11/10/09 12:08 PM[/u] Honey - It's okay, we can just say that the tender side was merely a legend to throw people off. That's what I plan on doing if any stories about me in such a situation get leaked to my future subjects. And I was the one asking for the advice. The sign on the door is cute. Unfortunately at 5'5" even /I/ would not be allowed to answer the door! I'm sure DBF would get a huge kick out of that, just like when I told him that he couldn't put the plates in the cabinets above the kitchen counter because then neither I nor the kids would be able to get anything down on our own. He started to say the kids don't need to, and I just glared at him and as I asked if he wanted me standing on the counters every freaking night, he apologized and agreed that I was right - the plates need to be within reach for us shorties in the household. I suppose I will talk to the son one on one. Although I don't think he'll get it, seriously. I don't think this kid knows shame. But I will attempt it. Then if it happens again I will have DBF handle it however he thinks is appropriate. Or maybe to make it fun I can design a "secret" knock that the kids have to use in order to get permission to enter the bedroom, kind of make a game of it. THANKS! Honeylioness - 11/10/09 01:02 PMazmom - Forgive my ignorance, but what is BLE? As to contacting the manager, perhaps a call asking what day and time would work best for him/her for you to come in for an interview. I would NOT get into the work history gap over the phone at this stage, it is inappropriate. IF it comes up during the interview you simply reply " I have been fortunate enough to be able to be at home full time with my children". Period - that is all legally, and actually more legally, than they are entitled to know at this point in the process. They may ask something like " Do you foresee any child care issues" - Just smile and say " No, we have that all in place" People tend to prattle on WAY to much in an interview about their kids, who would pick them up, what their spouse does .... please keep this in mind - THE EMPLOYER COULD NOT CARE LESS!!! This is about YOUR skills and how you can help THEM. Not to come across as too brutal, but if the first topic you bring up is your children, you have essentially removed yourself from consideration. Sheila - so sorry to hear about your relative. You are in our prayers. LOL - why am I not surprised??? Errr, what do you mean WAS? You mean someone changed the commandments? I will confess - I have been known to rinse off, fold and then re-use aluminum foil. If all I did was brown french bread on it - why NOT use it again? I am also one of those that rinses out ziploc bags I use in my lunch bag. I save the long strings that come from the tops of cat food bags, or around bakery boxes and use them in the garden to support my tomato and other top heavy plants. Rubber bands are in a plastic ziploc in a drawer next to a small ceramic pot holding twist ties to be re-used. Do you know how old I was before I realized that cool whip and margarine containers actually had a purpose BESIDES storing left overs? I think my original metal box was for biscuits or perhaps a sewing kit. Either way I outgrew it quite a while back, though I still have it and store smaller things in it. Would anyone here be shocked to hear that my button collection (which has both decorative, sentimental and utilitarian items) is sorted by color, or theme, into small pill bottles and jewelry boxes or baggies which are then living inside a wonderful old cookie tin? .... Anyone? *le Sigh* I know - the girl has major OCD traits with none of the official diagnosis benefits.
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Post by Honeylioness on Nov 11, 2009 23:48:51 GMT -5
Honeylioness - 11/11/09 11:29 AM
teh mom - Hasidism is a very conservative sect of Judaism. In many movies based in NYC you see images of Hasidic men who wear dark suits, Derby like hats over their yamulkes and the fringe of their prayer shawls can be seen under the hem of their vests. Distinctively they also tend to have beards and following a Biblical commandment not to shave the sides of one's face, male members of most Hasidic groups wear long, uncut sideburns called payot. Women dress very conservatively and sleeves must cover at least the elbow. Married women will only show their hair to their husbands so will wear either a scarf or a wig from the day of their marriage onwards.
Theologically, Hasidim are differentiated from other Orthodox Jews by their devotion to a dynastic leader (referred to as a "Rebbe"), their wearing of distinctive clothing and a greater than average study of the inner aspects of Torah.
There are perhaps a dozen major Hasidic movements today, the largest of which (with perhaps 100,000 followers) is the Lubavitch group headquartered in Brooklyn, NY. Other groups include the Bobov, Bostoner, Belzer, Gerer, Satmar, Vizhnitz, Breslov, Puppa, Bianer, Munkacz, and Rimnitz. In Israel, the major Hasidic groups besides the Lubavitch include: Gor (Gerer), Viznitz and Bealz (Belzer).
SES - I used to string and restring the wooden spools on pieces of yarn or ribbon and make myself rather haute couture adornment - at least in the eyes of a 5-6 year old.
We had one of those polaroid instamatic cameras that had the four sided flash bulbs you plugged into the top and it rotated after each flash. I used to fish the spent ones out of the trash because I had figured out how to easily pop the plastic cube casing off the spent unit. I then would take these little plastic covers and make tiny little vases out of them. Painting the outside with tiny brushes and a small kit of paints, or painstakingly gluing individual sequins in patterns around the rim.
Yep - the crafty/recycling/artsy geek made a very early appearance.
reenee - I love old embroidered pillowcases and have quite a few. I also used to make angel ornaments from old handkerchiefs that have either an all over pattern or just embroidery in one corner. They are really easy to do and make great gifts.
Sharing, if you are really serious I can send you some links to pictures of different parts of my studio .... though it is rather scary at the moment.
And thank you also for posting Flander's Field - I cannot think of a more apt piece for today.
Sharing the Simple Lifestyle - 11/11/09 05:40 PM
Honey, I am serious. I would love to see your studio. I don't have one (unless you count the 12" of loveseat space Kitty Nugget allows me) so I am going to send you some photos of work I've done.
calsfan - 11/11/09 08:07 PM
Honeylioness---regarding the Cool Whip bowls, a co-worker of mine said she received a gift of a “matching set of bowls” from an Aunt in North Carolina. She opened the box and in it was 24 Cool Whip Bowls with lids. She said the Aunt said it was a “starter set” and she’d add her own along the way!
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Post by Honeylioness on Nov 13, 2009 9:47:14 GMT -5
Honeylioness - 11/12/09 01:06 PM
calsfan - Congratulations on the new position! Glad to see the head of your company recognizes your talents, even if your supervisor is jealous. A great manager wants his people to exceed and excel, a manager who is just going through the motions only wants himself to look good, or at least not draw any negative attention his way from the higher-ups.
bonbon - Many items for a silent auction are goods or services donated by local people of communities - they get free PR and can write it off as a donation. Some things to consider as good auction items are:
* Ask a local restaurant to donate dinner for 4 or more, or perhaps just a GC (gift card/certificate) for $100
* Is there a local major league or minor league team nearby? Ask them to donate tickets to a game, or a really NICE team jacket.
* How about a local repertory theater? Two tickets to a play or comedy performance are nice.
* Combine the game or theater night with a car and driver. Call local limo companies or car services to donate a car and driver for the same evening.
* In my town the Rep Theater has a marketing collaboration with several restaurants - so the two together are willing to donate dinner and show packages.
* How about a local spa or salon? A GC for a massage or haircut would be an appealing item.
* Do you know anyone at all with season tickets to a major sports team? Perhaps they would consider donating one game's tickets for the auction.
* Ask the local grocery store for a food basket - or gift card
* Local florists, dry cleaners, wine stores - all are good ideas for donations. How about a CPA offering a $50 credit towards the preparation of your taxes. A landscaper could offer tree pruning.
Sharing the Simple Lifestyle - 11/12/09 06:17 PM
bonbon, The silent auction and many excellent suggestions (Honeylioness is undergoing cloning in 2010, despite her protests...we just need more Honeylionesses) will make this a success. It is as much about finding a voice for all of you who are grieving so sorely for this couple, and bringing people together. When is the auction to take place?
bonbon78 - 11/13/09 09:33 AM
honey-thanks so much for the suggestions. they are great. i had no idea even what kinds of things will be included, and now i have a much better understanding of how this will work. thank you!!!!
toasty-the auction will be the 25th, since everyone has off the next day for thanksgiving, it works out great. the funeral is tomorrow.
Honeylioness - 11/13/09 10:37 AM
ROFLMAO ..... I don't THINK so Ms. Sharing. Off the top of my head I can think of at least 20 people who would start the petition to prevent such an idea - with my younger brother and perhaps my father heading up the line. Not that they don't love me - they just usually shudder and turn green at the idea of more than one ME let loose on the world.
goddess - ummmmm .... I am actually done with my Christmas shopping. I hope to start on the wrapping this weekend.
H3LL YES!!! I love coming up with ideas and color schemes. Aside from a picture though could you also include some additional info so that my ideas might have a HOPE of matching your taste:
* Is there a piece, or pieces, of furniture that you MUST keep for any reason? If so what wood type are they, what color of upholstery are they covered with?
* What is the mood or theme you want the room to have? Elegant, Formal, Homey, Country, Romantic, Seaside, Rustic Cabin?
* What are your favorite colors?
* Are they pets/children to take into consideration?
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Post by Honeylioness on Nov 16, 2009 22:31:05 GMT -5
Honeylioness - 11/16/09 09:48 AM
The Grocery Challenge - Message #75493[/b]
I know it seems I dropped off the face of the earth after connecting in last month - who knew having a teenager in the house would be so exhausting and take so much of my time?
((Background: In August I became a Host Mother for a 17 yo girl from Germany who is here for the year doing her Junior year of H.S. So my household went from quiet with just me and the kitties, to an unknown world for me: texting, Facebook, clothes tossed into corners, a guest room that looks like a tornado just hit it, and lots of time spent with her new best friend giggling over who knows what......And a major increase in my monthly food expenses.))
Anyway, in quietly lurking and reading your posts I have come to a few self revelations:
1) I may be the last person in the country who routinely makes their own cleaning products instead of buying them. (yes I know, major geek alert!)
2) I have not purchased a canned fruit (aside from a jar of mandarin oranges I needed for a recipe) in over two years or jam in over six years. Again, another geek alert as I pick my own produce then put it up myself.
3) Most of the coupons I get either in my e-mail or in the newspaper are for products I never use.
4) I think I have been "un-conscious" for the last 6-7 months when I am in a grocery store. I got out of the habit of making a list, and/or sticking to it. I also feel as though with my job, volunteer obligations and being a condo Assoc. Trustee I don't have the time to drive to 2-3 different stores getting only the items there that have the best price that week.
Does anyone go to a store they really dislike (whether for "feel" or layout ) just for a few sale items? Just curious.
But having said all that I did finish tallying up my grocery receipts for October and came in under $400 for the month. (BTW I include cat food, litter, paper products etc under my Grocery Budget line). One of the things that has helped is putting my foot down with my student and not letting her "try" new things she is always seeing in the store - and I am shopping without her more. She has this "thing" about "American Bread" and was saying she would only eat this one type of Artisan Bread - but at $4.50 for a loaf I just about had a heart attack. From now on, if she wants something like that she will need to buy it herself!
Thanks for letting me ramble.
Dhunny318 - Message #75496 - 11/16/09 10:06 AM
You don't eat eggs? Or fresh veggies? how about milk or yogurt? Don't use toilet paper or paper towels? There are coupons for all of those things. Even our resident organic grocery hound uses coupons for her items. It's all in looking for those types of coupons. We're here to help you search!
Yup, I cherry pick at certain stores that I would love to stay away from for the most part, but when you're trying to save money you sometimes have to grit your teeth, put your big girl panties on, and go into that store for the cheap items or freebies. That's the life of a grocery hound lol
Honeylioness - Message #75501 - 11/16/09 11:00 AM
Dhunny - In my area (northern Massachusetts) I have never seen a coupon for fresh vegetables or milk, and only once in a blue moon for eggs. The few egg coupons I have seen are for what I would term "specialty" brands and even with the coupon the store "brand" is a much better price.
The "girl" eats a local brand of yogurt that is cheaper per ounce as we buy it in quarts, than any of the national brands even with a coupon. And if Costco would accept manufacturers coupons I could get an even better deal on T.P. than I do now. As for paper towels, I only buy them rarely as I am moving more and more to re-purposed t-shirts, towels, sheets etc for my cleaning rags.
suzi Q - 11/16/09 05:40 PM
$400.00 is somewhat high for two people and a couple of cats.
My budget is $200.00, but I do not include any animals (my dog died last year).
If I were you, I would check out some of the sales and stockpile a few cheap whole chickens. The rock bottom price is about 65 cents a pound right now. one chicken can provide 4-5 meals. Breast of chicken the fist night, tacos the second night, and lettuce with pieces of chicken for lunch.
I have cans of Del Monte corn that I paid 30 cents a can for. Feeds 2-3. i bought a 10 lb bag of potatoes at Ralph's recently for 99 cents.
I am about to make a 6 QT pot of spaghetti sauce with ground beef to freeze in containers for two meals each. The meat cost $2.50 cents for 2 1/2 pounds, and the hunts tomato sauce were FREE with my Register rewards from Walgreens.
The pasta is also free, purchased a couple of months ago at Albertson's.
I buy 30% of my food at Walgreens and CVS. Why? I have register rewards and Extra Bucks vouchers to spend.
it takes practice, but you make meals that are nuitritious and cost effective.
Think about all the costs that you put into a meal, and make adjustments up or down when necessary.
The Artisian bread may be purchased at Ralph's or Food 4 Less (something similar) for 50% when it is on markdown.
Dhunny318 - 11/16/09 05:53 PM
Honeylioness,
I used to think the same thing and was very loyal to the store brand. But once I started to see that with sales and with egg coupons, i could get a dozen eggs for .25 to .59, I was immediately converted. But my stores double coupons, so that makes it possible for me to do that every few weeks. I also researched on the life span of eggs in your fridge(why get 4 dozen at .25 each if they are going to go bad?) and found out that eggs have a loooooong shelf life in the fridge, especially if you put them in the bottom right of it. So, now when there is a sale and I can get them cheap, I do get 3 or 4 dozen to last me until the next sale.
I love that you make your own cleaning products. I do the same here. I'm a vinegar junkie, so it's used a lot in our household, not just for cleaning. I agree with Suzi: we'd love to see some of your cleaning product recipes!
cdarrow26 - 11/16/09 05:58 PM
Yep, me too. I have a grocery store that I detest...it's not in the greatest part of town, etc. But, every once in awhile I go there to cherry pick. The last great deal was free Purina One dry cat and dog food. I think I made 4 or 5 trips there that week and ended up with about 12, maybe more, free bags of pet food.
I am not able to duplicate the grocery deals most people do here either. I just don't have the same chain stores that run the great promos, double/triple coupons, etc. I just to the best I can and when I find a great deal, stockpile it like crazy.
Having lived in Europe, I can relate...do you have a bread machine? She could make loaves of bread pretty inexpensively. You can find a cheap/free breadmaker on craigslist or freecycle. I gave mine away when I moved last year. I wish I still had it, but hadn't used it in a couple years and didn't feel like moving another thing I didn't have to! Anyway, ingredients for bread are cheap and the texture is usually heavier and more to what she's used to, I would say. Good luck!
Honeylioness - 11/17/09 01:51 PM
cdarrow [/b]- thanks for letting me know that I am not the only one who has a shortage of stores that double or triple match coupons. Seeing what some of the other ladies are able to find the entire process does seem rather overwhelming - as though I am destined to fall short of other's achievements every time.
Thanks for the gentle reminder that I need to start baking weekly again. I get out of the habit in the summer because I don't handle the heat well and bread is usually off my menu list until the weather cools down and I can stand to use the oven once more! No bread machine here - I prefer to do it by hand - I am not a real "modern" woman in that regard
Oh good lord - E of G has followed me. I guess I have my own little stalker.
I do know that our current grocery bill is high - but getting it below $400 last month felt really good - like I WAS doing something right.
I do buy in bulk when it is cost effective AND I have the storage room available. I have a small upright freezer in the pantry where I keep hand picked berries for use all year (because I will not pay the high price for raspberries in December) as well as extra cans of frozen juice, butter, non-wheat flours and nuts. In the kitchen freezer I have two large containers - one for meat and one for chicken pieces.
I buy whole chickens and cut them up myself then wrap the pieces and put them into the bin, that way I can take out what I need for dinner before I go to work and they are thawed in the refrigerator when I get home. Same with packages of ground beef or family packs of steaks which are re-packaged into smaller sizes. I save chicken bones, wilted celery, onion ends and skins, leek tops etc in a plastic bag in the freezer - when the bag is full I will put it all into a pot on a Saturday morning, cover with water and make stock that I freeze in ziplock bags for later use. Same with beef bones I save and you can buy from the butcher for almost free.
I try to eat as "seasonally" as I can - buying that produce which would be naturally available for that time of year. Not only do I find it better for my body on a variety of levels, but things like squash and potatoes are better deals in November than asparagus or peppers. I do try once a week to make either a roasted chicken or roast that we use for several meals in different forms and I take leftovers to work for lunch.
Hmmmmmmmmm - Now I am feeling as though I have to justify, or defend, myself to the board. I wonder why that is? (Yes, I do sometimes type in stream of consciousness mode). Perhaps it is because as cdarrow pointed out I am no where NEAR the abilities of some of you and I feel as though I have failed already. I know it is early days as they say, but I still struggle with remembering all the acronyms and "short-hand" used. Perhaps it is because a couple of comments, not meant to come across as disparaging, actually were perceived by me that way - as though they were criticisms. I know a lot of that is my own filter - just thinking aloud I suppose.
Honeylioness - 11/17/09 01:54 PM
For those who asked about my cleaning products ..........
I have been making my own laundry soap for about 7 years now and I prefer this to any brand I had used before.
Laundry Soap
* 1 Bar Fels-Naptha soap ( Zote, Ivory, or castile soap can be used in place of Fels-Naptha if you cannot find it)
* 1 Cup Washing Soda (I use Arm & Hammer - and NO ... Baking soda is not the same thing)
* 1 Cup Borax (most common brand is 40 Mule Team)
* Water
* Large plastic container with lid (I use a clean kitty litter container)
Grate or shave the soap into a large pan with 6 cups of water and heat to melt/dissolve the soap.
Add the washing soda and borax and stir to dissolve.
Pour into the bucket and add another 4 cups of hot water. Stirring well to be sure everything is mixed.
Add 3 1/2-4 gallons of cool water to the bucket and give it all a final mix.
Replace the lid and let sit overnight. It will set and become gel like. I use an old cup to scoop out the mix and add to the washer. One cup per full load - less for smaller loads. Occasionally you may want to stir it before you use it - but I no longer do. It may separate a bit if there is too much water - I just pour it off into a load.
It has no dyes or perfumes and gets your clothes really clean. It will not cause undue fading since there are no harsh chemicals. And it is more environmentally friendly than store bought detergents.
I figured it costs me about $2.50 a batch to make and I can get 25-30 loads from one batch.
**Note** if you mix only the dry ingredients together you would add 2 tablespoons per full load and keep it in a sealed glass jar.
I no longer by fabric sheets for the dryer. Of the last box of 50 I bought about two years ago I still have sheets left. In a glass jar I keep on the shelf above my washer/dryer there are about 10 "used" dryer sheets sitting in a 1:1 dilution of liquid fabric softener and water. I normally hang my clothes to dry year round - but for heavier things such as rugs, blankets or jeans I take out a sheet, squeeze it well and toss the damp sheet into the dryer. These sheets are almost indestructible and can be used over and over and over again. When they get really ratty I use them to back applique pieces (that's another topic).
I use a LOT of plain white vinegar:
* Add it to the laundry to eliminate odors
* Mixed 1:1 with water it is great for the side of the tub and toilet, backsplashes and counter tops.
* Mix 1 Cup water, 1 Cup rubbing (isopropyl) alcohol and 1 tablespoon vinegar to clean windows and mirrors. The alcohol will aid the evaporation of the liquid.
* Dump your bucket of used water from washing the floor into the toilet to "flush" it - it won't automatically re-fill. Pour straight vinegar on the inside of the bowl - it will break down mineral deposits and de-odorize the bowl.
* Heat the mixture in the microwave until it is barely hot, spray it on shower walls until it runs into the drain, let stand 10-15 minutes then scrub and rinse. The heat helps soften stubborn soap scum and loosens hard water deposits.
* Clean shower heads that have been clogged with mineral deposits with undiluted white vinegar. Place 1/4 to 1/2 cup vinegar in a plastic food storage bag, and secure the bag to the shower head with a rubber band. Let stand for 2 hours to overnight, then rinse and buff the fixture to a shiny finish.
Baking soda is a mild abrasive that you can use to scrub the bathtub or stove top.
When you change your box of baking soda in the refrigerator don't throw it away. Boil a pot or kettle of water. Sprinkle half the baking soda into your kitchen drain and pour some vinegar on top of it. It will fizzle and do so as it flows down the pipe - this not only deodorizes the drain it helps soften and slough off grease deposits - follow this with half of the boiling water then repeat.
You can also use it for polishing silver. Wash items, then place on aluminum foil in the bottom of a pot. Add a baking-soda solution (1/4 cup soda, a few teaspoons salt, 1 quart boiling water) to cover for a few seconds. Down side is that it smells - upside is you get the tarnish off without dangerous chemicals.
Toothpaste (just plain regular paste - not the gel - I prefer the basic Crest) will shine chrome - rub it onto the faucets and rinse.
With a soft cloth rub some onto tarnished silver then rinse. I also use an old soft tooth brush to work the paste into handles or silver decorations to get them clean.
Put some onto a tooth brush then "brush" your rings. It really cleans and brightens my diamond solitaire.
Lemonade Kool-Aid use: Cleaning lime deposits and iron stains inside the dishwasher. Pour a packet of lemonade Kool-Aid (the only flavor that works) into the detergent cup and run the (empty) dishwasher.
nasagreen - 11/17/09 01:58 PM
honeylioness [/b]- me too, Florida doesn't have any stores with doubles/triples on coupons (I think it is a state law, but who know), so I feel your pain
oot-n-aboot - 11/17/09 02:11 PM
Welcome to the pound, by the way! I am generally in lurker mode.....boss is out at the moment But, please don't think you have to justify YOUR budget to us. If you keep an open mind, our way of saving money does work, but it is not for everybody. It does take some time and patience.
The drug stores have been a gold mine for me personally! What I am able to save there on toiletries, frees up some money for real food at the grocery store. Hubby and I are on weight watchers, so I buy lots of produce (free frozen veggies with coupons) yogurt, I splurge on a greek yogurt with honey and use coupons to buy Yoplait for my DH and DD. I pay more for breads to fit into my diet plan and better cuts of meats. But, with my pantry fully stocked, I need very little week to week.
When I do shop, I may pick up milk, Silk, eggs or eggbeaters (I found blinkie coupons next to the eggbeaters) bread and some fruit (whatever is sale that week) and some produce. The rest of what is in my cart is whatever I feel comfortable bringing into my house that I can buy with coupons. My DD is 11, so steamed brocolli is a no-way-in-heck will she eat that! so, I keep some frozen dinners, chicken nuggets, frozen pizza....you get the picture....for her in the freezer. Now, I don't allow her to eat that c r a p every night, but some nights, she just doesn't like what we are having, so I am not going to force her to eat it.
I go home for lunch 99% of the time, so I eat 3 meals a day at home, and I do not miss restaurant food. It is working for my household, but I devote some of my time every week to saving money, and believe me, DH sees the results of my hard work. He tells me each time he pays a bill, with a surprised sound to his voice! I know he thinks money is just POURING out of the checking account by the bags I bring home! LOL, he's so funny!
cdarrow26 - 11/17/09 02:18 PM
Huh...really? I re-read my post, I don't see that at all, and certainly never meant anything of the sort...I am nothing other than welcoming, supportive and helpful to all on this board. I'm sorry if you took something other than that from my post...
nasagreen - 11/17/09 02:28 PM
honeylioness [/b]- we all welcome you despite your specific needs, you can use many of our tricks to get more for your dollar at grocery stores. sometimes the coupons aren't always what we want to buy. what store specifically do you frequent, by the way? (if it is costco, what other grocery stores are in your area that aren't membership clubs?)
Honeylioness - 11/17/09 02:29 PM
cdarrow - [/b]My bad!!! You know how you have those moments when the phrase or paragraph is all written out properly in your head - but by the time it comes out onto the keyboard you have taken several mental "short cuts" just assuming that of course other people will instinctively know where you ran off the road?
That's what I did. The statement SHOULD have read in it's entirety:
Perhaps it is because as cdarrow pointed out, others on this board are able to score such amazing deals with the help of local stores and specials - it is good to know that I am not the only one who is at this point is not able to duplicate some of your more spectacular bargains. And as a newer reader of this thread it can make me feel as though I have failed already.
Honeylioness - 11/17/09 02:35 PM
nasagreen[/b] - Thanks. Aside from Costco (which I use primarily for film developing, paper goods and cat litter) the main grocery chains here are Hannafords and Market Basket. I have also recently discovered that there IS a Stop N Shop relatively near me as well, and a Trader Joes which I rarely frequent except for specialty items like certain dried fruits.
The Market Basket nearest to my house is the store I referred to that gives me the willies. Hard to explain exactly - whether it is the odd lighting, the funky smell, the stares I get when I have ventured inside or something else. I do know that I will not buy produce there as it is all pre-wrapped on cellophane packs and after bringing home something for the third time that was already rotten (which you cannot tell when it is trapped in plastic) I said "never again" to essentially throwing away my money. Plus the cockroach I saw in the bread aisle "may" have something to do with my bad overall impression of the chain.
oot-n-aboot - 11/17/09 02:41 PM
Honey: Really?
'splains everything!
alpha_yankee - 11/17/09 02:41 PM
I think that you did a wonderful job. I started hounding about 16 months ago. At the time, I was spending upwards of $1000 per month for two adults and a toddler (including diapers). Now, I still budget $500 per month, but most months hit around $400. I still shop at Whole Foods for a lot of my meats and vegetables that I can't get at the major supermarkets, so that's about half of my total.
Hounding has let me cut certain costs out of my budget without sacrificing the quality of foods that my family eats. I could definitely spend less, but I don't like to use a lot of boxed or canned foods and I don't have a ton of time to spend chasing down every deal. You have to find the balance that works for you and your lifestyle. Kudos to you and to all of us on this board that are making the effort! Nothing burns me more than someone who complains that they can't do it (no one here, of course). We have a wide range of women on this board, from SAHM's, WAHM's, working professionals, business owners, military; white collar, blue collar, all across the spectrum. We are all a testament to the fact that this is do-able, no matter what your situation is.
And with that, I am stepping off my soapbox ;-).
nasagreen - 11/17/09 02:41 PM
honey [/b]- our local winn dixie is like that--really cruddy and nasty. i used to cherry pick there, but the deals aren't that great (most of the time I don't have the right coupons), so I don't bother the drive to the store. i am satisfied with my savings at my other store (Publix)
I think Stop and Shop has terrific deals. Perhaps someone who uses that to make most of their savings will let you know how to get more info. mainly, we buy from the ad, get it at a low price, and try to match coupons/discounts so we maximize savings. there is a good handbook we have that explains more about grocery chains and their pricing systems (it is a cycle). post your email if you want me to send it to you. we also do a coupon exchange, so if there is a coupon you can use, we can all send it to you and help you save even more
that goes for anyone new who wants more info about how we organize ourselves, and also get the Grocery Challenge Handbook and the Miniseries about how grocery stores do things. just post your email and i can email you back
alpha_yankee - 11/17/09 02:54 PM
honey: sounds like you are in my Mom's neck of the woods and my old stompin' grounds. You are totally right about Market Basket. I don't know how they have stayed in business. Their stores are always nasty. Hannaford is a pretty good chain, but a little pricey and the deals are not as good as what you will find at Stop N Shop. You might want to check out the grocery store forums at HotCouponWorld dot com. All three of those stores have their own forum. MB and Hannaford's are not very popular, so they might not be updated very frequently, but the Stop N Shop deals are usually posted in a timely manner. They should also have threads in each forum that explain the coupon policies at each of the stores.
Do you have access to Shaw's at all? Every so often, they run phenomenal catalina deals that could make it worth the extra drive. Usually, this involves buying a certain dollar amount of specific products and getting a register coupon for $$ off your next shopping order. For example, buy $30 worth of soup (calculated on shelf price, not sale price), use coupons to reduce your out of pocket (OOP) expense, and get $15 to spend the next time you are in the store. With sale prices and coupons, this often works out to be a moneymaker (MM). They also double coupons (up to $1, I think).
suzi Q - 11/17/09 09:25 PM
Honeyliness,
Please don't feel that way.
It was probably my comment about the $400.00. I apologize.
We just try to help.
For example, I used to spend $1000.00 or so a month for 5 people and a dog.
The thing about budgets and charting what you spend is that you just try to make the next month a little better.
Pretty much eat the same or with similar foods, but make little adjustments here and there.
I just kept spending less and less, until I got to a point that I didn't WANT to spend any less, because it was uncomfortable for me to do so.
You figured out that the bread that your teenager likes is slightly expensive, so you have made adjustments.
That is a good thing.
I also want to thank you for sharing your cleaning products formulas, uses, and recipes. You are very good at this!
This is another area that could save me money and help me re-cycle certain things.
JennysMom - 11/18/09 04:40 AM
honeylioness ~ Hi, it's Jmo. (Disregard the different screen name, my 'puter has MSN Wonky Disease). *Whew* I just caught up! Here's my opinion of you getting under $400/month: You did extraordinary! That's my opinion and I'm sticking to it. What I love about the Pound is that we're not in combination (competition) with each other. And between you and me (no one else's listening, right?) I was happy when I got my monthly food budget down from $700/month to $600 month. Whaaaaaaaaaat?, Honeylioness yells!
I'm sure you can understand what an accomplishment that was because--after all at the time I had a huge, I mean a huge family. Why it was Jenny and I. Yeah, I was/am into natural/organic choices, but there's really no excuse for that! I was just going into a store in Grocery Land and buying whatever we needed (and she wanted) at whatever price the store wanted to sell it to me. If it was on sale, I thought I was lucky and I'd buy one or maybe two. But I shopped 2X a week and usually spent about $170/week. And I usually shopped at just one store.
Yep, so back in 2005, we're talkin' two people here. If you don't believe me, put 3 into the page box on the top left. Yep, you can time travel back to page three of this thread (Message #26 under JennysMom) and read my first-ever Pound message.
Read that, Honeylioness, and you'll put everything in perspective and realize you did terrific! The most important thing is simply how much in awe of you I am...
JennysMom - Message #26 - 01/26/07 09:51 PM
I, for one, will be rooting you all on from the sidelines. But I do have a progress report of sorts. I use to spend about $700/month for food. Granted, I'm into natural/organic but I never felt great about that amount. This has been an odyssey of sorts for me. I started last April and have kept track each week what I spent. I'm happy to report this month's total is $243.43.
Here is what I learned on my journey: I use to think just stick to a list and get what I "need". My pantry, 'fridge and freezer weren't very full. I only bought what I needed twice a week and thought that was the way I would save money. Now I have a total different mindset. First, I go to the store once a week, with a list but am on the lookout for deals. I've shopped at the store for the last 18 months, and I now know what is the "regular price", "phantom sale" price, and "rock-bottom" price. There is a huge difference. In my neck of the woods (and from my career in grocery retailing), I've found there is about 12-week cycle that prices go through. I've always had quite a memory and have learned to have a "ceiling" what I will pay for a product. I know eventually that product (for example) that I saw for $1.67, will go to 2/$3.00 and finally, 10/$10 or BOGO. When it hits that rock-bottom price, that's when I stock up. As a result, my pantry and freezer are now my store at home. I don't need to go to the store when I'm out of something, because I know I got it for the best possible price & it's in my pantry. If it's a "loss leader" (when a store puts something on sale to literally pull you into the store, hoping you will buy other products), I buy it at the beginning of the week's sale, and then pop back in one last time only for the loss leaders before it goes off sale. I am lucky because the store I shop at is only 1 mile from my home & in a shopping center where my drug store, video store and bank are as well. When gas hit $3.50/gallon here last spring (CA), I learned to bundle all my errands into one trip and I've saved money on gas as well.
No, I'm not yet at the point of Suzi's amazing tales of free groceries or other such heroics, but wanted to share my journey and hope it may help others trying to cut their grocery bills. Us WIR's need to stick together!
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Post by Honeylioness on Nov 16, 2009 22:59:18 GMT -5
Honeylioness - 11/16/09 10:47 AM UPDATE: 13/25 NEO 14/20 NSD/CSD SMKY -[/b] I echo the others in being glad you and the lil-smokey are okay. And yes, at about 60-72 hours AFTER is when your body will go on strike and hurt the most. reenee - Good for you accomodating that customer. Sometime managers are way to busing following the letter of the law instead of the spirit of it. And speaking of spirit - I liked the idea of taking out some thud with your Nelson. When I was attacked RT years ago my "weapon of choice" was the tried and true Grab-Pull-Twist. That is the abbreviated wording for the following manuever: Sink Fingernails Into Groin, Grab Tightly, Pull/Yank down HARD While Simultaneously Rotating Your Hand 180 Degrees In Either Direction. This move is almost 100% effective in getting your assailant to loosen his grip enough so you can flee your own home, scramble over the fence into your neighbor's yard and run into their kitchen to call the cops. While leaving your soon-to-be-ex-fiance on the floor in the fetal position. Sharing - I owe you an e-mail. I will try to get to that this morning. EOG - Great news about your DSis' Mom but BOOO on the bed situation. Not to be a Debbie Downer but you may have to have the mattress either professionally steam cleaned or just toss it and buy a new one. Bed bugs have become a big problem here every Autumn when all the college students return to town. If you can get your hands on a portable steam cleaner it would be much better than OFF. In fact a recent article stated: Elusions of Grandeur - 11/16/09 11:38 AM Honey[/b] - I am SOOO glad you found that. Somehow I missed that information about DDT and bed bugs. I just warned DBF not to cover the kids in it! Honeylioness - 11/16/09 11:15 AM So - what did I do with my day and a half student free time? Well, first of all a mini-rant. The choral group was supposed to get back to the H.S. on Saturday night at midnight. However they didn't actually show up until 1:30 am! Thank goodness I told her to call when she got off the highway exit and was not waiting over an hour in my truck outside. But I was so tired and wanted my bed. When I called her around midnight to see where they were she said I could go to bed if I wanted and she would walk home. Ummmm ....NO !!!!!! Not going to let a 17 yo girl with a large overnight bag walk home through downtown in the middle of the night. No matter that it only takes her 10 minutes to do that walk on her way to school I hope this means I get the "Good Mommy" star for the day. However what I did get done this weekend was: * Updated my budget Spreadsheet * Balanced my checkbook * Three loads of laundry * Two hours of ironing (just seven more shirts to finish) * Went to the Grocery Store * Dropped off three bags of recycling * Changed the sheets on both beds * Pulled furniture out of the Living Room so I could put down the room sized rug for the winter (I love my wood floors but they do get chilly!) * Maneuvered my bed and hope chest around to put down the winter rug in my bedroom * Made a double batch of chocolate chip cookies * Got half of my studio straightened up * Re-potted a plant * Started polishing my silver for the Holidays. Finished the coffee service and tray, the serving dishes, serving utensils (gravy spoon, serving forks, pie servers etc.), knives, large spoons and teaspoons. Just need to complete the dessert and dinner forks. Honeylioness - 11/16/09 12:17 PM WHAT? You don't have three-four-or-five projects going at any one time? And no stash?!?!?!?! what IS the world coming to (said VERY tongue in cheek as I try to stand in front of my 1,000+ yards of fabric ) reenee - Some ideas that popped into my head as reading material for your brother are below. I picked these because not only are they good stories, but the endings are either positive or have a non-preachy moral lesson for the reader - That you can rise from adversity and less than ideal circumstances. Watership Down The Old Man and The Sea Call of the Wild (or any book by Jack London) Anything by Mark Twain The Good Earth Moby thingy Of Human Bondage Red Badge of Courage Swiss Family Robinson Angel - Yep, every spouse or sweetheart of a deployed soldier occassionally needs to spend time with BOB (battery operated boyfriend) startsmart - I am in awe that you have found yet more time in your day to add another thing, and in awe of what you have chosen to do. While I do many different volunteer activities I know my limits; incarcerated youths, abused children and animal shelters are just not possible for me to work with hands on. I get either too angry on their behalf or much too emotional to actually be of any practical use. reeneejune - 11/16/09 12:33 PM Honey [/b]- Thanks for the list. I think I remember my brother liking Mark Twain... yes, that's right. Huckleberry Finn was one of the books I read to him before he dropped out of high school. He liked Tom and Huck because he had been a mischevious boy too. Honey/phiti - I try to be very good and only buy fabric for projects I'm going to complete within the next 2-3 months. I then make myself complete the projects before I buy anything else. This shopping trip was a special case because it's Christmas presents. Honeylioness - 11/16/09 12:53 PM Because "Jarring" just sounds too disturbing? starsmart - Ummm, if Harry is going to get a new girlfriend shouldn't her name be Sally? phitigirl - 11/16/09 01:30 PM Honey - LOL!!!! Oh yeah, I totally have four projects going right this second in various phases of completion. Most are just tops waiting to be sandwiched and quilted. But I haven't been quilting long enough to have acquired a large stash yet. I'm working on it with leftovers from projects that I have finished but I am nowhere close to having enough of a stash to make a while project from. Ideally I would like to finish the four I'm working on before I buy more fabric, but my will is very weak when faced with a fabric store!!!! dea_81 - 11/16/09 02:23 PM I am trying to find the most cost effective solution to wrap up cookies I am giving for Christmas. Anyone have cheap, but attractive ideas to package baked goods? Honeylioness - 11/16/09 03:39 PM dea - Look for a store like I-Party, or in the yellow pages for any sort of party supplier. We have one locally that sells colored Chinese food boxes which are cute for holding some cookies and a piece or two of fudge. You can also usually find single color cellophane bags, patterned ones cost more. Also check with stores like Michaels and other craft supply stores for low cost containers. For rock bottom cost you could use plain brown lunch bags from the grocery store - cut out a large motif from last year's wrapping paper or old Christmas cards and write a greeting on the front of the bag after gluing the cut out on. Then fold over the top of the paper bag - use a paper punch to make two wholes and thread curly ribbon through the holes from the back, tying a bow in front. Look through the Dollar store, or local thrift stores for old tins, after they are washed out and lined with wax paper they are great for larger items. If you are baking mini loaves get some pretty colored saran wrap then top with a ribbon or bow. Or check out Christmas Tree shops - they often have seasonal ceramic loaf pans you can bake in then use as part of the gift. How about cookies stacked in a cleaned out Pringles can that you re-cover with holiday paper? Rum balls or other round sweets inside a tennis ball container. Cover an empty oatmeal container with wrapping paper for a larger gift of cookies.
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Post by Honeylioness on Nov 17, 2009 10:19:44 GMT -5
Honeylioness - 11/17/09 09:58 AM[/u] I am glad to see that I am not alone in my utter disgust and loathing for BOA. My mortgage used to be with CountryWide (loved them!) but when they were "acquired" by BOA I swear I could smell the sulfuric fumes rising from the first piece of mail I got from them. Their idea of Customer Service is a complete joke - the pin heads manning their phones are neither service oriented not even human. I looking into a re-fi when the rates were at 4% which would lower my current rate more than 2%. At first they were all smiles and eager to help - then they dropped the bomb. Yes I could go to the lower rate on a 20 year fixed. BUT they wanted me to pay points and overall my monthly payment would go UP $200. EXCUSE ME? Why the h3ll would I take THAT deal?? Moron boy at the other end of the phone seemed genuinely baffled as to why I would not jump at the chance .... I mean, my rate would be going down. RME I then had a very clueless woman call me to say they noted that each month the payment due did not match my remittance. I know. Each month I round up the actual payment due, and occasionally add a bit more. This "extra" of about $100 a month is designated "Principal Only". She seemed genuinely confused as to why I would do this. When I explained to her that this was not only "legal" but would help pay down my mortgage faster her reply was "Oh, well I don't think you can do that and it is confusing our system. Could you please just remit the amount actually due only?" I swear, as soon as I get the rest of my closing costs together and in hand I am dropping them faster than you can say "spit". At this point I have joked that if Mestopholese himself opened a bank and hired chimps as staff I would prefer it to dealing with BOA Angel D - 11/17/09 10:47 AM This is as bad as people who can't understand why someone wouldn't jump at the chance to lower their payment (even if it raises the rate & extends the payback period). I mean, who wouldn't want to trade in a car with only 3 payments left when you can get a brand new car for a lower payment & they'll even pay off your old loan. Sure that lower payment will extend 72 months, but what a deal! Adrian Black - 11/17/09 11:35 AM I think these customer service people are trained with idiotic responses to educated consumers. I was looking into a refi (as I learned the interest rates were down to about 4%). The guy on the phone knew my current interest rate was 6.5%. Then he countered me with a 7.5% interest rate. I told him "why would I want to pay 7.5%, when right now I'm paying 6.5%?" He told me "because we can roll your car payment and your credit cards into this refi. Plus you can get cash out!" I told him I only had 4 car payments left and I was not interested in rolling my credit card balances into the mortgage. I just want a lower rate. He told me that 7.5% was the "lowest available" rate! How stupid did he think I was? I would walk into any bank and see advertisements for rates at 4%. He countered me with arguments like "don't believe everything you read" and the banks are only offering "teaser rates" and those rates will go sky high the moment the consumer signs the papers. I told this guy to have a nice day and hung up.
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Post by Honeylioness on Nov 18, 2009 16:23:44 GMT -5
SES_Books - 11/17/09 10:35 PM
I'm heading for bed soon (Onyx is issuing orders) but I just had to pop in and say how beautiful my kitchen counter is with rows of ruby colored chokecherry jelly, amber colored peach jelly, and dark amethyst plum jelly. Tomorrow I will add topaz colored rose hip spiced cider and perhaps some leaf green tinted apple mint jelly. Oh, I forgot the bright red cinnamon apple jelly I did yesterday. When the sun pours in the east window it looks like a kaleidoscope is sitting in my kitchen.
With my new stove I can do this in about a quarter of the time it used to take. I will have enough jelly for everyone I know and even for any new friends I pick up along the way.
9/8*974*/89+---++-*+(translation--greetings from Onyx)
Gin1984 - 11/18/09 10:02 AM
SES:[/b] Would you be willing to walk me through canning? I have read a book and we plan to plant a raspberry and a blackberry plant and I would love to try it but I am scared to do it on my own. And hi to Onyx.
SES_Books - 11/18/09 12:55 PM
Gin--[/b] I'd be more than willing to guide you through jelly making, on one condition--you can't tell anyone how stupid simple it really is. Let it be a mysteriously difficult feat that will make everyone think you are a fantastically talented genius in the kitchen. How about cinnamon apple for Christmas? Give me your email so we won't hijack the thread.
SES_Books - 11/18/09 03:01 PM
Gin-[/b]- Summer will be even better. It will give you a chance to check yard sales, craigslist, freecycle for some supplies. I probably get 80% of my jars at yard sales. I will make a list of the supplies you will need and email it to you.
Keeker - 11/18/09 03:53 PM
SES[/b] please send the canning information to me also, keeker 86 at yahoo dot com. Especially the cinnamon apple for Christmas?
Thanks!
SES_Books - 11/19/09 03:53 PM
GGGGGRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!![/b] to all who might try making jelly. BE SURE YOU USE BIG POTS I currently have 3 dozen jars of jelly and one bowl of mixed fruit jelly on the counter and a stovetop of burned on apple jelly sugar! Earlier this week I used my big 10 qt pot to cook the cider jelly. Everything went great. I took the big pot to the basement since i wouldn't need it again. I switched to my 5 qt pot for cooking the rest of the jelly. Everything went well. I was tired last night and decided to clean up my "production line" today.
This morning i realized I had everything on hand to make some plain vanilla apple jelly for my BIL. So I did. But I forgot to get my really big pot. Results: big boil over, smoke alarm screaming, jelly demanding rescue, 2 cats panicking, me saying words I shouldn't know, TJ dashing through the now open door to hide under the grapevine, Onyx is already under the bed "hollering" at me. Eventually things calmed down, both cats are on the deck looking in-but not willing to come in, the sink is full of stinky pots, the jelly jars are cooling and the stove is a black burned sugar mess. I am so glad I chose a smooth top stove. I also learned that badly burned sugar messes will sometimes burn to black ash that can be brushed up. When everything cools I can start on the rest of the mess.
Moral of the story---use BIG pots. If you have more than 5 cups of juice use the 10 qt pot! I was such an idio.t!
Honeylioness - 11/19/09 04:05 PM
SES [/b]- OUCH!! I can feel your pain. I did something similar with a batch of applesauce. You must have enough "wiggle" room to actually stir the contents. I didn't and as a result not only scorched the contents on the bottom of the pan (took two days to soak and scrub clean) but I had to toss the entire batch as it all tasted "burnt".
startsmart - 11/18/09 12:03 AM
Warning: Long, slightly whiny post about my year. On paper it seems that I'm doing okay. My income has increased about 14% over last year and once again I have 5 different employers to reconcile come tax time. I've paid off $5,240 and some change and should have another $40 or so next month. My savings increased due to the settlement and tax refund.
But it really seems like I'm treading water. I had very limited chances to contribute to my retirement this year, I don't even know the numbers. I came nowhere near maxing out my Roth and my house is the only real investment I have. This week I'll be going in to talk to my director about my direction with the company and hopefully a raise and more responsibility. If I don't make more at this job my income is going to fall - sharply. I'll be investing time sharpening my teaching skills for the tutoring job but that won't start to pay off until the Spring when SAT time rolls around. AND since I have another job I won't be working as much as other tutors.
When I look ahead five years (one of my exercises this month) I have a modest list of what I want to accomplish. YES, it's modest, no paying off a house or sailing the world. Even when I look forward one year I don't know how I'm going to make my goals. And they're not absurd goals either. I guess I feel stuck, so many things don't seem possible on a single person's income and, try as I might, I can't bring in the type of money a two person income family does. It doesn't help that everywhere I turn I keep getting offers that make me wish I was working at In&Out Burger instead. At least they get chocolate shakes...
Rationally, I know that I'm taking steps to make things better, I've enrolled in a class for the winter quarter and I'm presenting some income generating ideas at two of my jobs, negotiating to get a pay increase for two other positions. It's just... frustrating I guess. I don't feel like I'm working towards more money for the sake of more money, I have specific objectives and know how much it will cost to reach those goals. Maybe it's just more isolating doing it all alone. I really don't know.
3catslady - 11/18/09 12:32 AM
Startsmart;[/b] At least you have objectives.. The only objective I have is getting a new place to live that will not take all my income, and yes, I am a single person with no retirement except SS. I wish I had kept all 3 of my 401k's. I would be sitting pretty right now even with the loss in the market. But I do have all you to keep me on track. I don't know what I am going to do if they cut more hours at work. I am doing okay but I want better and I don't know how to go about it. I don't have any goals or objectives for the coming year and I don't know what I want. Well, that's not true, I know what I want but not what I can afford. Right now I don't even have motivation and with winter coming, all I want to do is sleep. I need something to kickstart my bu))tt and get moving but I don't know what that would be even if it hit me in the face.
SAD is setting in early.
reeneejune - 11/18/09 12:58 AM
Startsmart [/b]– please don’t take this wrong, but perhaps you should look more at the social/personal side of your 5 year plan rather than focusing so much on the financial side. When I focus too much on money, I start getting depressed and making s.tupid decisions in my personal life. Just a thought. What are you going to do to enrich your personal life next year?
3cats - Getting a new, affordable place to live IS a goal. Bringing stability to your life is a goal. And in my opinion, that's enough.
3catslady - 11/18/09 01:52 AM
reeneejune; [/b]I feel like I should be doing more but I don't know what else I should be doing. Therefore the SAD.
startsmart - 11/18/09 03:20 AM
reenee- thanks for the comment, I know it's going to be hard to understand (and some people refuse to believe it) but I am quite happy with my social life right now. True, I am not dating and I'm fine with that (for now). Over the past 7 years I've really honed in on my circle of friends, acquaintances and family. The only thing I would change would be to have my grandma back but that's not really possible. I get suggestions like "go out dancing" or "join a church" all the time and I know they're well intentioned. But honestly, that would drive me batty.
As far as the financial/social connection right now it's more about having the savings built up so I can take a day off to hang out with a friend or take a long weekend to attend an out of state wedding. Sure, I have bigger vacation plans and some larger personal/family goals that are a few years out but I don't think that I've neglected a social life recently. Sure, it may seem like I'm at home every night (only because it's NaNoWriMo) but for my personality, it's a good balance.
dea_81 - 11/18/09 08:48 AM
startsmart -[/b] the stuck feeling isn't only limited to single people. I have felt stuck many times in my life. I currently am in that same stuck place again. I keep trying to remind myself that every time we have been stuck things do work out. I know what needs to be done and I just have to keep at it. 2.5 years ago I felt so much like I was treading water and that I would never reach any of my goals (a baby and a house) and on paper I could not see how it could work out in less than 4-5 years. Now we have a 15 month old, bought a house last January and managed to pay $7000 in debt off before the baby arrived. Daycare expenses have slowed debt repayment by quite a bit, and now I feel stuck again. My point is the path is long and winding...you may see the places you want to reach, but the way there isn't always clear. Just keep going one foot in front of the other, you will get there. I have to remind myself on a daily basis that just because I cant get to my goals as quickly as I want doesn't mean it won't happen.
dakota4600 - 11/18/09 10:55 AM[/u]
Startsmart[/b[- I agree with Dea. I also think it is this time of year. We see lots of outflow from our coffers, even if it is planned and feel like we are behind. I would love to max out my Roth, but it isn’t going to happen for several years. (I’m pretty sure I’ve got at least 10 years on you and I just opened my roth 3 years ago and come no where near maxing it out). With no raise for next year (though the board wants to relook at that at the end of quarter) I don’t see increasing any contributions to retirement on the horizon. I’m pretty sure DH will not be getting a raise next school year either, so we are looking at 2 years of flat earnings for both of us. But we made the choice to work in non-profit and education so we know that those are the breaks.
3cats- SADD is difficult to deal with. Though I do think we all take a few weeks to adjust to the time change as well. I’m just now getting used to it being dark by the time we sit down to dinner.
Honeylioness - 11/18/09 03:50 PM
startsmart - I too struggle with similar feelings of "How am I ever going to get to X on just my salary?" It can feel as though you are just a lonely salmon in the river of life - treading water on a good day, or trying to swim upstream and jump a small rapid on a bad day. And on the really AWFUL days you just KNOW there is a grizzly bear waiting at the top of that waterfall.
While I acknowledge your feelings and empathize I would like to have you consider a few things:
1) You are much more aware and proactive about your finances than probably 90% of people you age. I did not get that "conscious" until I was in my late 30s
2) You have had the chance to at least START thinking of and putting even small amounts aside for retirement. The first company I ever worked for where a 401(k) was even offered was 10 years ago, and I would not have known what an IRA was if it had come up and bit me in the a$$
3) Under 30 and already acquiring equity in a home. I don't personally know anyone else else in that position.
4) You are blessed with a diverse set of skills and a mind set that lets you work more than one job. Quite a feat when many parents can't get their 20-something childrens' behinds off the couch to even work at McD's
5) The fact that you are holding even in the current economy is nothing to blow off. In a time where unemployment is over 10%, your state is virtually broke and thousands are losing their homes and have no insurance you are doing remarkably well.
6) And, I am old enough to be your mother, and at this point in my life should probably face the fact that I will be alone the rest of my life. So there is no one else to help me prepare for any possible retirement. And my 401(k) balance is so small in comparison to where it "should" be that I am ashamed to even tell anyone the balance. But I keep adding my meager 6% of gross pay to it every week. Why? Because it is better than doing nothing.
I am sorry you are in a funk and I hope you feel more in control soon. Just remember that you are doing the best you can and to put unrealistic expectations on yourself may be more self-defeating than motivating.
Honeylioness - 11/18/09 03:55 PM
3cats[/b] - *dusting off my hands* Okay, now that I have dealt with startsmart it is YOUR turn young lady!
First - YES finding new housing is not only a goal but a vital one for both your emotional and physical well being. I am not happy thinking about you "roughing" it in your current situation another winter.
Secondly - If you would like "something" to kick yer b()tt into gear - consider me it! If I have to I will hound you daily to ask where you applied for an apartment, who have you called? What letters have your written until you will get another situation just to make me go away
!!!!
RME - Sharing, you need to back away slowly from the espresso machine!
Gin - Church rummage sales have proven to be a gold mine for me in terms of jars etc that I use for canning.
MuttleynFelix - 11/18/09 05:10 PM
startsmart - [/b]A lot of people have given you really good advice about how to look at future goals, but I think I will add my 2 cents. The beginning of 2008 I wrote out some goals for DH and myself. Then I ignored them for essentially a year and half. Wouldn't you know that DH and I achieved everyone of our short term/prechildren goals. I wouldn't focus too much on the details of your goals and being depressed about making them or not. Life will throw you a lot of curve balls over the course of your life which you already know. Your goals may change or adjust accordingly. Life can change fast especially for those of us in our 20s. Just keep an open mind and don't get too hung up on the financial side of life. When you have a good plan, the end result is often what you want it to be even if the process isn't. Don't get too hung up on the process.
moneysquirrel - 11/18/09 09:27 PM
startsmart --[/b] relax. You are young and have more saved than most people my age. I know that you want to have everything planned to a T but as one who could almost be your grandmother I will tell you that is a good goal but life has a way of getting in the way. One major disaster can totally change everything. I can't tell you how many people in my area have lost everything they had due to Katrina and are starting over in their fifties and sixties with little savings. Many lost jobs as well as their homes. I was very fortunate to come out of that with minor house damage. Had no job because my school was flooded in 8 feet of water for several weeks and was eventually torn down and never reopened. But I like many in this area became more aware how important family and friends are, how much of stuff is not essential, and how much the simple things meant. I was one who stocked up on stuff a lot. My stash now is more in line with my new attitude. I am still using some items that were in the stash and Katrina was 4 years ago.
MittenKitten - 11/18/09 10:10 PM
For those who suffer from SAD I recommend upping your dose of vitamin D. I suffer from it and have since before High school. I always wondered why I was so happy in the summer and depressed in the winter. I have done the light but find it impractical with the kids, I have tried St John's Wort but then worried about the side effects, especially since I was on BC at the time.
This winter I am using the vitamin D, 1000 IU in addition to what is in my multi vitamin. We have had some glummy days and as of yet I have not suffered from SAD. Try it, it certainly can't hurt. I know I also try to get outside everyday. Although I need to try harder now, maybe I will try to go for a walk every day and get some more exercise.
startsmart - 11/18/09 10:48 PM
reenee-[/b] no worries, I just find that there's a pervasive attitude that ones life cannot possibly be complete if you're single and I have finally found a good balance. I've had people tell me I'm not happy, I'm not balanced and I can't possibly be content. It's one of my pet peeves actually
Honey- may I just say that I first saw "now that I have dealt with startsmart"[/b] and I was a tad afraid to scroll up?
all- thanks for the suggestions and support. A large part of my perception problem is that I don't compare myself to people my own age or even older. It's like a reverse "keeping up with the joneses" because a lot of the time "better than x" doesn't mean a whole heck of a lot. I wouldn't expect to lose weight eating McDonalds twice a day because "it's better than fried twinkies!" Well, sure, but that doesn't mean it's the best I could be doing either.
I'm sure some of it is plain jealousy, my brother for example is 18 months older and living with his 4th (5th?) fiancee in seven years. He pays for nothing, gets all the side benefits of a partner, my parents continue to support him and if they don't the state will and he's considered to be "normal" because he's in (another) dysfunctional relationship. And I look around and see that I'm relatively independent in my finances and choices, pay for my own c.rap, get no financial support that I don't earn by working and still have to fight against this perception among some of my friends and family that there's something wrong with me. I would have loved to take a cruise this year like my brother. Or pay $0 in rent/mortgage. But I pay my bills and debts and save and work my assets off and I'm still the weird one?
One of my status updates this week was "do you ever get tired of doing the same thing? Even if it's the right thing?" That's just my state of mind right now. I know that the actions I'm taking (or not taking) are good to great for my financial, mental, physical and emotional health. In the places where I'm weak I'm at least working on it. And yet there's this overlying feeling that it will never be enough, I won't get ahead and in the end I'll just be the schmuck.
Gin1984 - 11/18/09 11:02 PM
Startsmart: You and me girly, I am 25 too and always worry I won't get ahead and won't make my goals either. It is hard when parents support only if you have nothing/ won't work. Here what I do, go over what you have done in the last 1 and 5 years. That may make you feel better. Also moving with DF I am not working and it drives me nuts but I am busy so working does not make sense for me now. All I do is tell myself that this is just one step and I will get the nexted. You can do it!
MuttleynFelix - 11/19/09 09:53 AM
Startsmart [/b]- I don't know if it is a midwest thing, or just a how I was brought up thing (although most of my friends seem to have the same philosophy). By 25 you should be independent. Maybe it is because around me most people have kids by 25. I don't know, but no you are not weird by being an adult at 25. Mommy and Daddy shouldn't be paying for you at 25. You should be on your own two feet. While my parents are very generous to me and my DH (they did pay for our wedding, but it was because they wanted to, and honestly it was more for them than it was us), we stand on our own two feet. Also, they are equally generous to all their children and none of us take advantage of it.
My DH would be embarrassed if we ever asked them for money. I was embarrassed when I needed to float a quick loan when I bought my truck and I thought I was going to have to ask them (DH who we were only dating at the time loaned me the money to pay the sales tax on the truck and so I could make rent since they were due at the same time, that was a live and learn lesson). Personally, I can't understand why someone would want their parents to help them out. Its the same way with the government and assistance and people being ticked off about "well, where's mine". I can earn mine and I am proud to do so. I might get screwed in the end, but I don't need help and I am proud of that fact. The thing is that when you rely on someone else for something you are bound by their rules (whether they enforce them or not). Isn't it better to live by your rules and your life?
(Sorry if I offended anyone with my rant).
Firebird. - 11/19/09 01:19 PM
Honeylioness-[/b]- I loved your response to startsmart. You're such a wise one. I always picture you and Toasty as Owl on Winnie the Pooh.
startsmart-- I get where you're coming from... just realize that you *are* still comparing yourself to other people your age even if it doesn't feel like it. I can't imagine how hard it must be to watch your brother freeload while you're working like crazy to put yourself in a better position but it is just a waste of energy to be jealous of him *hug* I mean, as Muttley says, it's not like that's a natural state. In the long run, you know you're better off than he is.
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Post by Honeylioness on Nov 19, 2009 15:25:16 GMT -5
Honeylioness - 11/19/09 01:49 PM This is me today ladies. And why is this me today? Because today is the Great American Smoke Out and I told myself I would go 24 hours without a cigarette. That I have done so far, it's the not committing homicide that is proving harder to fight Me wanna  NOW!!!!!!! calsfan - WOW, you beat me by a week in the mailing Christmas items department - congratulations! Sheila - glad to hear your Aunt is doing better, what a scary time this must have been for your family. Firebird - shouldn't you be studying?  reenee and all the other sewers (and yes reenee, it has always bothered me that written down it looks as though our hobby is playing in waste water *RME*) - Having a mini fit that my tree skirt is not going to be anywhere near done for Monday's Guild meeting, and perhaps not even for use under my own tree this year. *grumbles* I have made them for other people why can't I see to finish my own??? On to sewing machines. I agree that the Singers made in the 1980s and 1990s were not worth the powder to blow them up. My mother had one and it was nothing but trouble. I have four machines currently: * A no-name brand I got on sale when Ames was closing that I take with me to classes because it is lightweight * A Simplicity that has turned out to be a little work horse and has the option for 10 decorative stitches, more than I need actually. * My 1918 cast iron Singer in it's original table cabinet. The pedal is actually hung on a hook just inside the open cabinet on the right and you operate it with your knee. It may only go forward and backward but nothing daunts it - not wool, denim, leather or the heaviest of quilts - it is a real power horse. * And finally, a circa 1930-1940 Singer, again cast iron, in it's own carrying case. Not as big as a regular machine but not a Featherweight either. I found it at a yard sale, seems to have rarely been used and only cost me $20. One thing to keep in mind is that the more you use a machine the more often you MUST do the maintenance. Including removing the casing from the bottom of the machine to get access to the drive shaft and underside of the bobbin assembly for cleaning and oiling. I try to do this after I finish quilting a quilt - amazing how much lint and dust and general "fuzzies" collect in there and start gumming up the works. BurlyOwl - 11/19/09 02:21 PM honey[/b]- Keep it up for the Great American Smokeout. We can let a little homicide slide if it helps ease the urge. My DOD promised DOM that he'd quit before I was born. Kinda' didn't happen. But 32 years later, he finally did quit this fall before Babyowl came. I am so proud of him. Smoking is a difficult addiction to fight. I don't envy you being faced with it. And I am proud that you are participating in today! Sharing the Simple Lifestyle - 11/19/09 02:33 PM
Honey, quitting cigs was fairly not bad (no family members were sacrificed) but I once went four days without coffee and could not write a sentence or tie my shoes. firebird, Or is that W.O.L., LOL! I think Pooh or Owl was the first published dyslexic. Thank you.I can't say much for wisdom, but with these new glasses, I resemble an owl as I peer, peek and crane my neck to figure out what the heck is printed on book or screen. Whoooo! Whoooo! (Signed, W.O.L.)
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Post by Honeylioness on Nov 23, 2009 13:23:47 GMT -5
Sharing the Simple Lifestyle - 11/22/09 08:14 PM
nitza! Honey! The (very good) exDH phoned today! Yes, indeedy, an ex DH sighting! An amazing box of stamps arrived this week. Two cards of thanks are prepared and the appropriate "extra" to nitza. He is over the moon...can't believe two complete strangers would mail him boatloads of stamps. Christmas came early for exDH. He's honestly a wonderful human being. Not so for ex DH#2 who was, well, not wonderful. At all. Honeylioness - 11/22/09 09:25 PM UPDATE 19/25 NEO 20/20 NSD/CSD[/b] azmom - if you are still looking for a stuffing recipe the one I use is my great grandmother's. She was French Canadian and mine starts with a Pepperidge Farm bag and then uses ground beef, onions and celery. If you are interested I can write it up onto my blog. It is always a big hit at my table. And you do cook it in the turkey for the best flavor, but you can make it in a casserole dish. start smart - I hope you are feeling better. No worries, see my list below - I think I did enough for both of us. As to my NaNoWriMo - I need to upload my last feeble attempts - no way am I going to make the 50,000 word limit *le sigh* and I was not able to find any really local write ins. Oh well - perhaps next year. My ideal day? Hmmmm - it would have to include breakfast in bed served to me by a special someone, a massage, then either a day curled up on the couch with a great book/movie - or a very productive day working on a quilt with no interruptions. Then my favorite dinner before a decadent bubble bath, another body massage then a full 10 hours sleep. Firebird - I am Owl? Hmmmmm, never thought of who I would be in the 100 Acre Wood. Somehow, if I had to think about it, I would see myself more as Kanga. Sharing - I am just glad your exDH got the package!!! Smoke Out - I wish I could tell you that I made it all day Thursday without a cigarette, but alas I wound up caving and had three - which is less than a third of what I would normally have during a day that was as stressful as Thursday was. So while I cannot say at the moment I am cold turkey'ing it - I am very much more aware of my "triggers" and making more of a conscious effort to stop and think before I light up. So far I am still way below my pre-thursday amounts for the weekend. I would love to be able to vent about what is going on at work - but I need to wait until after things are disclosed by the company at our annual Analyst meeting in NYC on December 17th. New years Eve - Anne and her BFF are still talking about going into Boston for First Night - all I can is - more power to them!!! I guess I am getting old - if I did anything at all it would be getting together with a couple of friends to play board games and eat cookies. But if the two girls want to go downtown in freezing weather with thousands of others - I am willing to pick them up at the train station. For some reason that is always the coldest and most miserable weather night all year - it may be dry but five degrees with a wind chill of -10 - or in the 40s so the ice sculptures threaten to melt and it rains cold drizzle on participants all night. Now - what I have done this weekend .... * 3 hours of ironing - actually emptied my ironing basket * Did laundry and put away all my, and Anne's, laundry * Scrubbed full bath * Scrubbed half bath * Swept bedroom, halls, three sets of stairs and dining room * Disassembled chandelier in dining room, cleaned all prisms and reassembled fixture * Dusted, polished and did a deep clean of my bedroom * Polished wood furniture especially in the dining room * Finished polishing my silver serving pieces and flatware * Went to grocery store and finished shopping for Thanksgiving dinner * Cleaned out both cat boxes and scrubbed them out * Put out room sized rugs now that winter is almost here * Scrubbed down kitchen cabinets, kick plates and all baseboards * Emptied the cabinet under the sink and scrubbed it out * Washed kitchen light fixtures as well as the table and chairs * Took down kitchen curtains, washed, ironed and re-hung * Scoured kitchen floor (my major Cinderella moment - actually on my hands and knees cleaning the floor) * Cleaned the stove * Made four loaves of pumpkin bread * Made three loaves of New Brunswick Oatmeal Bread SES_Books - 11/22/09 09:46 PM Honey--[/b] you are definitely Kanga. I think I am Eeyore. (oh, woe is me) Scrubbed on the stove top off and on all day. I don't think i'll ever get it off. why did this have to happen just before Thanksgiving and Christmas cooking? Sharing the Simple Lifestyle - 11/22/09 10:27 PMHoneylioness[/b], Gosh, I'll betcha half of L-------, MA can claim a French-Canadian grandmother. Those were interesting times. Do you know that the Province of Quebec still mourns the loss of thousands of young women who went south to work in the textile mills? The emigration had lasting effects...over succeeding decades, the declining population growth due to emigration slowly diminished the province's ability to negotiate for special treatment. In places like St. Albans, VT, many, many family names are still French-Canadian in heritage. The Maritimes, as your recipe attests, suffering a net outflow for better employment southward. You and red_wagon are both history buffs and share this heritage, so I know you're well aware of this chapter. Interesting, just the same. And yes, you are definitely Kanga. Anne is one lucky exchange student. Honeylioness - 11/22/09 11:00 PM Sharing [/b]- I do know that one of the main reasons Lowell was able to flourish as a major textile center was due to The Mill Girls - many of them from Quebec and surrounding provinces. My area of town is actually known as Little Canada and there are two Franco-American social clubs in walking distance of my house. One of the things the main mill owners, the Bootts, did in order to encourage girls to come work here was set up systems to reassure their families. Boarding houses were strictly No Men Allowed and each had a House Mother to keep an eye on the girls. The Bootts also sponsored and build a church - an Anglican church in the down town area - St. Annes. It is the only church in the country ever to be established by a company and not a group of congregants. One of the reasons they did it was they assured the parents that each girl would attend Sunday services or get her pay docked. My mom's maiden name is definitely French. Although on a funny note - there was an odd physical anamolly that appears in alternate generations on that side of the family - a large hawkish nose that at least two men, never women for some reason, get. We could never figure this out - it is not a French feature per se. However when my mother was in college and working on a required course work of tracing her geneology we finally discovered our answer. It seams in 1793 a relative of mine living around what is now the US/Canadian border either participated, or came across after wards, an Indian village that had been raided. Among the ruins was a small boy of about 5-6 years of age. This ancestor brought the boy home, re-named him Phillippe and I guess that was supposed to make him French!! But at least we know now where the prominent profile comes from - my seventh or eight generation adopted ancestor - a Huron Indian. Sharing the Simple Lifestyle - 11/22/09 11:13 PM
Honeylioness,[/u] Well, that too, was not uncommon! That's exactly right. You are 100% there. That area flanking the border on both sides remains proud Huron First Nation territory, but more so as you get closer to New York. red_wagon also claims some heritage in that direction. It's possible you are seventh cousins or something! Wouldn't that be fun! As with the textile mills (I had heard that also, that conditions were strict for the young women), northwestern Quebec where I taught one year, saw many men (in this case, an English-speaking Algonquin First Nations community) go to upstate NY to log, and as well, take part in the massive highway construction phase circa Dwight Eisenhower. We tend to forget, focused as we are on the Rust Belt and the loss of manufacturing jobs in the midwest, that all parts of our continent have known hard times at one point or another. SES_ can share fascinating history of the Dust Bowl/Depression era of Kansas and other Plains states. Oh! How we do wander joyfully from topic to topic! reeneejune - 11/23/09 12:51 AMSharing [/b]– It’s actually from my (roughly 5 lb.) Family Circle Encyclopedia of Cooking. I got several excellent cookbooks as prizes during my 4-H cooking days. Sharing the Simple Lifestyle - 11/23/09 07:40 AM reeneejune,[/b] Oh, the trusty Family Circle. Gosh. Classics. And tell away about your own local history! It's all fascinating, like finding a puzzle piece and where it fits on a very large challenge puzzle. Tales of the Oregon Trail would be marvellous to hear. Honeylioness - 11/23/09 09:43 AM reenee [/b]- The "old" cookbooks are the best!!! A few years ago a boss gave me the "new and improved" Betty Crocker cookbook - with the red/white plaid cover. PPPPFFTTTTTT. I still prefer my 1950's version with the stained pages, recipes that use butter and classic recipes and tips - like what is the difference between a rump roast and a round roast. My other Must Have cookbook was put out by Cutco in the late 1950s, early 1960s. Not only does it have great basic meat recipes, diagrams of cuts of meat but on the first page of each section (pork, lamb, poultry etc) is a simple chart telling you how long and at what temperature to cook anything from a 3 pound boneless leg of lamb to a 20 pound turkey. In my family we all have one and even my brother the cooking snob would not give his up for anything. Let's see - I also reference quite a bit my Frugal Gourmet books, Breads From Around the World (because where else would I have learned to make and love New Brunswick Oatmeal bread or Egyptian Honey bread?), and for really fancy dinners my large Victoria Magazine cookbook. Then there is my 1884 copy of Mrs. Lincoln's Boston Cook Book, another specialty book called Foods from the Bible, and of course my dog eared Jams, Jellies and Condiments. Hmmmmmmm .... Anyone else thinking my father was right when he said I was born 100 years too late? Of course if I HAD been born during the Civil War there would have been some very obvious drawbacks and deficiencies: * I would not have been allowed to vote * I could not have purchased my own home * I would be considered quite odd even for a "spinster" * I am glad I live in an age of indoor plumbing and refrigeration * I would most likely have struggled to meet women of like minds such as you all * One word - corsets reeneejune - 11/23/09 04:03 PM Sharing –[/b] “thriftiness” runs in my family… family legend holds that my great-great-grandpa purchased the land we still live on for $300 in gold and a Meerschaum pipe. Great-grandpa donated the land that is now the main city park… it was once a cow pasture. Great-grandpa was also a scrounger of the highest order, building entire houses out of found/free materials, almost all of which are still standing and still lived in. The insulation in Grandma’s attic is crumpled up local newspapers from the late 1950’s and early 1960’s… we once found the ad for my Dad’s family home in the classifieds on the back side of a picture of Great-grandpa and his hunting buddies in the old papers up there. And just a glimpse of what the women in the family are like… great-great grandma was so deadly accurate with her buggy whip she could (and frequently did!) take the head off a timber rattler from the seat of her buggy without slowing down.
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Post by Honeylioness on Nov 24, 2009 9:20:24 GMT -5
Honeylioness - 11/23/09 04:21 PM *sigh* okay, I need to get this off my chest before I implode. With all due respect and apologies to those who have functional Y-chromosome life forms in your lives - Men Suck. Okay, a few particular men specifically. Like Redhawk who thinks calling me every five or six weeks is actually "working or maintaining a relationship" ..RME. And now Ken who told me he would be coming for Thanksgiving but has not contacted me, nor returned my e-mail, as to whether he really IS coming and does he have a flight or has he had to cancel. AND his cell phone mail box is "full" so I cannot even leave a bloody message. Then Anne's BFF's father decided that he and his wife will spend Thanksgiving with her brother (the BFF's uncle) as he will be going for an extended visit to Brazil in a MONTH!!! Like there was no other time you could have had a family dinner? ? So instead of 8 for dinner I think we are five - or maybe six ... no, six (I invited a man I work with whose sister's family is sick so they canceled dinner at her house) and perhaps seven if Ken deigns to make an appearance. AND at this point I will be canceling the Yankee Swap party I had offered to throw for the exchange students in the area. We sent out a "save the date" notice at the beginning of the month and a reminder on Friday. I am tempted to contact the area rep today and have her send out a message that says "Due to lack of response, and therefore I believe interest, the student party on December 6th has been canceled". Am I just the last dinosaur out there that thinks RSVP should actually MEAN something??? Or that common courtesy would at least dictate you drop a quick e-mail to a persons saying either "Thanks but I can't make it" or "I will see you there". I am not sure if I am more annoyed at Ken - who is supposed to be a friend and knows how much it hurt me and upset me when Redhawk pulled this non-communicative last minute CARP .... or at the other host families who are setting lousy examples for their kids by ignoring basic social etiquette ...and who, I can almost guarantee, will have at least one person snipe me for canceling JUST because I received no calls or e-mails from anyone. Am I being completely unreasonable here? Why should I put out my time and money preparing food for a possible 20 people when I have no idea if even ONE will show up??? And what if no one shows .... how bad am I going to feel then? *sigh* My quilt meeting is tonight and part of me really really doesn't want to go - but I feel like I "should" reeneejune - 11/23/09 04:58 PM Honey [/b]– I understand how you feel. No, you’re not out of your mind to believe that people should RSVP. I think the problem is that so few people host anymore, they don’t understand what it’s like to stand in an empty house with food for 20 prepared and going to waste. SES_Books - 11/23/09 05:24 PM Honey--[/b] I think at this late date you are perfectly justified in having the area rep make an announcement as you suggested. An yes courtesy is dead. Sharing the Simple Lifestyle - 11/23/09 06:03 PM
Honey, Ditto on both counts to SES_'s answer. Then, plan something totally fabulous, $$ or not, to do that night that pleases YOU. There's always a reason to get together in January. Courtesy, where it can be found, is all the sweeter for its rarity. red_wagon - 11/23/09 11:56 PM Honey[/b] - very frustrating. Did you give an RSVP by date? They might think they have more time or something. I didn't read everyone's advice, but think it through before you cancel. I know you're peeved at the moment. I hope it all works out. They'll be missing out for sure if they don't show up!!! I'm sure you throw amazing gatherings (with even more amazing food!) Firebird. - 11/24/09 07:17 AMHoneylioness[/b]-- I don't know the background story with these people but it's incredibly rude not to RSVP to any kind of party for which you receive a formal invitation. Anyone with basic manners knows that... how can the hostess be expected to plan otherwise? I'm sorry the men in your life are being carpy Angel 33 - 11/24/09 08:29 AMHoney [/b]I think it is extremely rude not to RSVP. I guess people just aren't taught common courtesy anymore. I try hard to teach my kids manners. I hope that it sticks with them as they become adults. mrslynch - 11/24/09 10:40 AMhoney[/b]--i feel your pain on the lack of rsvps. dd's bday party is next week and not one single person has rsvp'd yes or no. it's so frustrating to plan when you have no idea how many people are coming! SES_Books - 11/23/09 11:31 PM I just remembered why i make fruitcake cookies only twice a decade. I have spent the past three hours slicing, dicing, and chopping about 5 pounds of nuts and dried and candied fruit. I do it by hand for a more consistent dice. I am truly crazy. At least the cookies will go together fast tomorrow. Of to bed now. Honeylioness - 11/24/09 09:13 AMSES - I have never made fruitcake cookies before .... want to send me the recipe? I do make a fruitcake for Dad each year during the Thanksgiving weekend. However I refuse to use those weird green cherry "things". I will confess I buy the candied orange peel and citron as that is too labor intensive for the small amounts I need. But then I purchase high quality dried fruits like berries, pineapple, peaches, pears and dates - which I soak at least four hours in rum. Then pecans and walnuts. Once the cake is cooled I line a tin with wax paper and cheesecloth then pour rum over the whole thing and close the tin. Each week it gets another "bath" of rum and I take it with me for Christmas. Even people who have said they don't like fruitcake will eat mine.
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And good (real) coffee places!
I love finding the perfect gift for somebody, something they don't know they want, didn't ask for, and when they open it, think 'wow. this is perfect for me!'